San Francisco Deals and Coupons

One-Hour Massage or Energy Balancing Session at Madrona Healing Arts

Charity Miller is a gifted healer with ten years' experience as a Reiki master, certified aromatherapist, bodyworker, and energy-balancing practitioner. Meet her at her holistic studio and discover inner balance: • $45 ($90 value...

Dental Exam, Cleaning, X-Rays, & Teeth Whitening at Opera Plaza Dentistry

Dr. Sahar Tawfik has been practicing dentistry for more than two decades, so she's well-versed in diagnosing and treating a wide array of oral-health issues. Clients rave about her skill and friendly staff: • $79 ($450 value) for...

Hair Services at Peter Thomas Hair

Salon founder Peter Thomas brings more than 35 years of experience to each client's locks. The chic Shattuck Avenue salon has happy clients raving about the talented staff and the breezy, artistic atmosphere: • $25 ($55 value) fo...

Haircut, Highlights, Blow Dry, and Style at Salon One 50

When you settle into your chair at this sleek salon, you'll feel like the only customer -- given how personalized the attention is. Land a gorgeous 'do tailored to your looks with this deal from the spot that's been beautifying the...

One-Hour Massage at Morello Family Chiropractic

Bay Area native Dr. Morello focuses on providing holistic, focused care. His years of experience and heaps of technical knowledge mean that he can effectively customize his massages to your body's precise needs: • $29 ($60 value)...

“Best of Tchaikovsky” with the San Francisco Symphony at America’s Cup Pavilion on July 20 (Up to Half Off)

Classical music boosts listeners' brain functions and energy levels, which is why every child should ingest a well-rounded harpsichord each morning. Treat your noggin to a mellifluous meal with this GrouponLive deal. The Deal $20...

One Blowout, Three Blowouts, or Hydrating Hair Masque and Style at Rags 2 Riches Hair Lounge (Up to 68% Off)

Perfectly styled hair can make you look confident and ready to tackle the day, especially if you pair your hair with a fashionable dress and football cleats. Look and feel amazing with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $22 f...

MoodTu Fest with Diggy Simmons & Jacob Latimore at The Warfield on Saturday, May 23, at 12 p.m. (Up to 34% Off)

Going to a concert is the only way to listen to music in public without having to put your mouth around a discman to catch its sound vibrations. Enjoy easier listening with this GrouponLive deal. The Deal $24 for one ticket to Mo...

$10 for Indian Meal for Two at Urbann Turbann ($20 Value)

Eating food is necessary for survival, like breathing in air, drinking water, and not breathing in water. Keep yourself alive with this Groupon. . $10 for Indian Meal for Two (Up to $20 Total Value) Two wraps or rice bowls (up to...

Two or Four Hours of House Cleaning at Cillas Cleaning Services

Getting a sparkling clean home is easy with Cillas Cleaning Services, a local company committed to quality and providing each home with the unique care it needs: • $69 ($140 value) for two hours of house cleaning • $99 ($200 val...

1-Hour Swedish Massage with a Body Wrap at Alexandra's European Skin Care Spa

Persistent aches and pains don't stand much of a chance against this comprehensive deal from this high-end, European-inspired wellness and beauty retreat in Dublin that garners great reviews: • $55 ($211 value) for a Swedish mass...

60-Minute Full-Body Organic Massage at The BodySong Massage Center & School

Owner Rachael Angelese carries more than 15 years' experience as a certified massage therapist, body healer, and teacher, helping creaky customers find relief: • $50 ($105 value) for a one-hour full-body organic massage • Make a...

$30 for Three Groupons, Each Good for $20 Worth of Food at Pizza Express ($60 Total Value)

Pepperoni is considered among many to be the perfect pizza topping, mainly because it perfectly enriches the flavor and adds just enough weight to transform a pizza into a functional Frisbee. Dine or toss with this Groupon. $30 for...

5, 10, or 15 TRX-Xtreme or Beach Ready Boot-Camp Classes at Resort Fitness (Up to 87% Off)

Most fitness experts describe TRX training as a resistance exercise that tones muscles with one's own body weight, whereas others describe it as a game of tug of war against the ceiling. Beat the rafters with this Groupon. Choose f...

$35 for One-Month Membership to Parkpoint Health Club (Up to $78 Value)

Getting regular exercise is as important to physical health as maintaining a healthy diet and sleeping 18 hours a night. Stay on top of your game with this Groupon. $35 for a One-Month Health Club Membership (Up to $78 Value) Memb...

$79 for Three-Hour Guided Paddleboard Tour with On-Shore Lesson, Wine, and Oysters at Napa Valley Paddle ($194 Value)

Humans often relax by communing with nature: hiking through mountains, paddling down rivers, and eating berries indiscriminately. Get your fill of nature with this Groupon. $79 for Guided Paddleboard Tour with On-Shore Lesson ($194...

10 or 15 Yoga-Pilates Classes or Month of Unlimited Yoga-Pilates Classes at Innerstellar Pilates & Yoga (Up to 78% Off)

Yoga teaches people how to sustain poses while controlling their breath, a technique most yogis use to live undetected in wax museums. Steady your stillness skills with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $35 for 10 yoga and ...

Los Cabos Suite + Dinner for 2 at Marbella Suites en la Playa

Escape Kit • A Four- ($299), Five- ($374), or Six-Night ($449) Stay for Two in a One-Bedroom Garden-View Suite • Or, a Four- ($399), Five- ($499), or Six-Night ($599) Stay for Two in a One-Bedroom Partial Ocean View Suite • One R...

All-Inclusive Puerto Vallarta Resort at Vamar Vallarta All Inclusive Marina & Beach Resort

Escape Kit • A Three- ($300), Four- ($400), Five- ($500), or Six-Night ($600) Stay for Two in a Standard or Superior Room From Now to July 4; and August 16 to December 20 • Or, a Three- ($353), Four- ($470), Five- ($588), or Six-N...

Boutique Costa Rican Resort at Hotel Byblos Resort and Casino

The Escape Kit • A Four-Night Stay for Two in a Bungalow with a $100 Food Credit ($449) • A Five-Night Stay for Two in a Bungalow with a $120 Food Credit ($559) • A Six-Night Stay for Two in a Bungalow with a $140 Food Credit ($6...

Oceanfront Boutique Resort at Sandy Haven Luxury Boutique Hotel

The Escape Kit • A Four- ($419) or Five-Night ($500) Stay for Two in a Superior Garden View Room • Or, a Four- ($700) or Five-Night ($875) Stay for Two in an Ocean Front Room • Daily Continental Breakfast and Mimosas • Combine ...

All-Inclusive St. Lucia Resort at Smuggler's Cove St. Lucia

Escape Kit • A Four- ($879) or Six-Night ($1,319) Stay for Two in a Garden-View Suite Between Now and June 30 or September 1 to 30 • Or, a Four- ($999) or Six-Night ($1,499) Stay for Two in a Garden-View Suite Between July 1 and A...

Beachfront Caribbean Hotel at San Juan Water Beach Club Hotel

Escape Kit • A Three-Night Stay for Two in an Atmosphere King Room ($398) • Or, a Four-Night Stay for Two in an Atmosphere King Room ($521) • Or, a Five-Night Stay for Two in an Atmosphere King Room ($639) • Daily Continental Br...

Three-Hour Kayak Rental for Two People at Sunrise Mountain Sports

There's a reason Sunrise Mountain Sports has been a trusted name in outdoor fun for nearly 40 years. Steal away for some serene and refreshing moments on Lake Del Valle, while you paddle around on two of their top-notch kayaks: •...

Bottle of Wine and Gourmet Cheese Plate at San Anselmo Inn

Carefully chosen California wines, Nicasio Valley cheeses, local honey, apples, nuts, and salami, all in a turn-of-the-century Inn situated in the quaint Gold Rush town of San Anselmo... it doesn't get any more charmingly California...

Hair Packages at Panache2 Hairdressing

With decades of experience under their belts, the master stylists at this charming Burlingame salon have an impressive gallery of awesome cuts, colors, and styles to take you from drab to fab: • $175 ($350 value) for a Keratherap...

Laser Toenail Fungus-Removal Treatment at Foot Doctor of the East Bay

Take care of unsightly toenail fungus with this deal from Foot Doctor of the East Bay -- featuring convenient offices in Los Gatos, Pleasanton, and San Leandro: • $299 ($900 value) for laser toenail-fungus removal for one foot •...

Two or Four Go-Kart Races for Kids or Adults at Driven Raceway (Up to Half Off)

Go-karts allow people to experience the thrill of driving without having to hear annoying radio ads or accidentally visit the World's Biggest Waffle. Stay on the grid with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $17 for two 10-lap...

Thai Meal for Two or Four at Chang Puak - White Elephant Restaurant (51% Off)

Thai cuisine is intense and complicated, like the reasons your uncle is staying with us for a while. Make room for this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $26 for a Thai meal for two (a $53.30 total value) Two soups or salads (...

$15 for $30 Worth of Pizza, Sandwiches, and Calzones at Mission Pizza & Pub

Without restaurants, waiters would purposelessly wander parks all day, folding swans out of actual swans. Keep their hands occupied with this Groupon. $15 for $30 Worth of Italian Food Toppings congregate atop four sizes of specia...

$49 for 20 Boxing Classes for Ages 9–17 or 12 Boxing Classes for Ages 5–8 at LA Boxing ($189 Value)

When boxers accidentally look at their target, it's called telegraphing, but when they hit opponents in the face with a typewriter, it's called texting. Communicate properly with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for 2...

Peruvian Food and Wine for Two or Four at Tambo Restaurant (Up to 62% Off)

Wine can function as a social lubricant and conversation starter, especially if you slowly fill the room with it. Uncork a good time with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $27 for a Peruvian meal with drinks for two (up to ...

Vegas Resort + Show at Bally's Las Vegas

Escape Kit • A Two-Night Stay for Two in a North Tower Deluxe King Room, Sundays through Thursdays ($150) or Fridays and Saturdays ($270) • Two Show Tickets to Jubilee! • $30 Food and Beverage Credit for Bally's Restaurants and ...

Jackson Lake Cottages at Grand Teton Lodge Company

Escape Kit • A Three-Night Stay for Two in a Patio Cottage at Jackson Lake Lodge ($583) • Or, a Three-Night Stay for Two in a Classic Cottage at Jackson Lake Lodge ($793) • Daily Breakfast for Two at the Pioneer Grill • Scenic C...

Ten Units of Xeomin at Recharge Medical and Day Spa

Recharge Medical and Day Spa's primary guiding philosophy has always been health and safety, followed by tranquility and quality of services. When we're choosing a medical spa, that's the kind of approach we want: • $80 ($160 val...

Ten Admissions to Community Pool at Terra Linda Community Pool

This well-maintained, outdoor facility boasts a shallow pool with spray features for non-swimmers, a diving board, Aqua Dash, and much more to make summer vacation a blast: • $25 ($90 value) for ten admissions to the pool • Kids...

5 One-Hour Private Guitar, Bass, or Drum Lessons at Lenny Gill

Students of all skill levels are welcome at these Oakland or Berkeley studios, where lessons are led by 33-year industry veteran Lenny Gill. Soon, like the students who call him an "awesome teacher," you'll be singing Lenny's praise...

90-Minute European Facial Package at Elle Skin Care & Permanent Cosmetics

"I would recommend Elle Skin Care to anyone who wants great skin care and professional service in a friendly, lovely setting," says one happy client. Find out why this Corte Madera studio has been described as "the best in Marin:" ...

One Week of Kids' Rock Music Camp at School of Rock Palo Alto

Since starting in 1998, School of Rock has become a premier performance-based music school for kids. And with plenty of glowing testimonials, this Palo Alto inspiration station is primed to rock your kid's world: • $299 ($599 val...

Stand-Up Paddleboard or Kayak Rental for Two at Half Moon Bay Kayak Co.

With Half Moon Bay Kayak Co., you'll discover a new way to explore the dynamic environment of the Northern California coast. Cruise among seals, birds, and other marine life, or take to the wild waters of the open Pacific, in an exh...

Four 30-Minute Swim Lessons at American Swim Academy

For the past 40 years, this family-owned aquatic academy has been teaching swimmers as young as 6 months how to safely navigate water. Let your little one -- or yourself -- pick up the prized skill under the guidance of CPR-certifie...

Ten Fitness Classes at The Fuse Fitness

The certified, motivational, and friendly instructors at The Fuse Fitness understand that your life is just a little bit busy. That's why they creatively tailor their total-body workouts to challenge your body, burn fat, and increas...

$30 to Spend on Food and Drink at Zen Restaurant

According to the Contra Costa Times, the cozy and elegantly appointed Zen Restaurant serves up expertly prepared fusion fare that is "fresher and more affordable than the competition." Savor the praised bites with this deal: • $1...

One Week of Summer Camp at The Vision Academy

Here's a smart idea: Combine summertime fun with learning at The Vision Academy. These camps provide each child with a fun, memorable, social experience while following a quality curriculum designed to promote academic growth and pr...

Three or Nine Kids’ Movie Packages with Popcorn, Drink, and Candy at BlueLight Cinemas (Up to 71% Off)

Before modern cinema, the term motion picture referred to tossing children's artwork out the car window. Catch a flick with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15.99 for three Groupons, each good for a kid’s movie package...

$49 for a Two-Hour Standup-Paddleboard Lesson at Demo Sport in San Rafael ($100 Value)

Until the recreational watercraft was invented, mankind's only hope for summer fun involved hitting candied hams with tree branches. This Groupon celebrates watery invention. $49 for Two-Hour Standup-Paddleboard Lesson ($100 Value)...

5 or 10 Studio Boot-Camp or Plyo-Pilates Classes, or 8 TRX Classes at bodyFi (Up to 64% Off)

Getting fit requires good ol' fashioned hard work, as opposed to becoming a world-champion body builder, which requires sacrificing your clean gym socks to the weight machines. Buff up without consequence with this Groupon. Choose ...

Family-Friendly Farm and Petting Zoo Outing at Pastorino Farms (Up to 55% Off). Six Options Available.

Petting zoos make it possible for people to see how animals interact with their environments and for animals to see how people interact with their weird, hairless babies. Witness the wonders of nature with this Groupon. Choose From...

$37 for an Italian Dinner with Appetizer, Entrees, and Dessert for Two at E’Angelo (Up to $76.50 Value)

Going out to dinner offers a break from the weekday grind and the weekend circus that always shows up at your house right when you're sitting down to eat. Get away from it all with this Groupon. $37 for an Italian Dinner for Two (U...

Laser Tag, Hot Dogs, and Soda for Two or Four at Escape (Up to 51% Off)

Before laser tag, most high-tech entertainment consisted of playing chess against a computer and chucking a victorious computer into a bog. Play nice with technology with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $20 for a laser-ta...

Full Set of Eyelash Extensions with Option for Touch-Up at Beauty By Tiffani (Up to 71% Off)

Wearing makeup is an age-old custom, just like pretending not to notice when someone has gained a lot of weight. Keep up appearances with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $79 for a full set of eyelash extensions (a $265 v...

$59 for a HydraFacial at Simply Gorgeous Day Spa ($120 Value)

Aestheticians know how to remove dead skin without accidentally uncovering your creepy skeleton. Take a little off the top with this Groupon. $59 for a HydraFacial ($120 Value) A HydraFacial offers the benefits of physical and che...

One-Day Family Pool Pass for Family of Four or Six at Pleasant Hill Recreation & Park District (Up to 57% Off)

Public pools allow you to splash around without having to take that job where you tow abandoned cars out of rivers. Get your feet wet with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $9 for a one-day family pass, valid for up to two...

$100 to Spend on Custom Framing at SF Framing

Having served Silicon Valley for more than 25 years, these picture perfectionists complement quality on-site work with a flexible turnaround and lifetime guarantee: • $40 for $100 to spend on custom framing • More than 1,200 mol...

Auto Detail Package at SCR Automotive

The family owners of this 20,000-square-foot, locally loved auto shop want you to feel like an A-lister while they clean and polish your ride. The staff is willing to go the extra mile for quality, and you'll feel right at home sipp...

Pilates Classes at Purely Pilates

This spacious Belmont studio teaches Classical Pilates, which adheres closely to Joseph Pilates's original celebrated method. The instructors -- who have all undergone a rigorous training program with 600 apprentice hours -- will le...

One Hour of Handyman Services at Athena Maintenance & Construction

From plumbing problems to fence repairs, these pros can take care of it. Call 'em up if you get locked out or need a lock changed, if you need a closet installed, drywall patched, or most anything else: • $45 ($95 value) for on...

One Month of Unlimited Classes at The Dailey Method

Everyone from SHAPE to Allure loves The Dailey Method's unique classes that combine barre work, core conditioning, and orthopedic exercises to strengthen muscles without punishing them: • $49 ($100 value) for one month of unlimit...

Ten Boxing Classes at Third Street Boxing Gym

Put 'em up and battle the bulge with a fun, effective boxing workout that includes jumping rope, cardio drills, shadow boxing, punching bags, and more: • $69 ($175 value) for ten boxing classes • One-hour cardio boxing sessions...

One Round of Golf, Bucket of Balls, and Parking at Resort at Squaw Creek

Tee up this deal, and you'll experience championship links-style golf at a course that was designed by Robert Trent Jones Jr. and that offers breathtaking views of majestic Sierra peaks: • $49 ($98 value) for 18 holes of golf and...

60- or 90-Minute Couples Massage and 60-Minute Facial with Champagne and Strawberries at World of Health (Up to 66% Off)

Massage was developed by NASA to help astronauts cope with edgy Tang-induced sugar highs, the lack of ESPN, and predatory aliens stowed in the hangar bay. Achieve its soothing effects outside the soul-crushing abyss of outer space w...

One or Three Classic European Facials with Reflexology at XTD Salon & Spa (Up to 54% Off)

Faces often look younger in the morning, before they have to deal with a day spent squinting at the sun or frowning at children who exhibit too much imagination. Rediscover that youthful feeling with this Groupon. Choose Between Tw...

$15 for $25 Worth of Spanish-Filipino Food at Patio Filipino Restaurant

Tapas are small, which is why you feel so big and powerful when eating them. Feed your forthcoming growth spurt with this Groupon. $15 for $25 Worth of Spanish-Filipino Fusion Cuisine The dinner menu includes paella Valenciana, a...

One- or Two-Night Stay with Olive-Oil Tasting, Wine, and Champagne at Stevenswood Spa Resort on Mendocino Coast, CA

Secluded, Four Diamond–Rated Boutique Resort in California Wine Country Stevenswood Spa Resort is hidden deep within a redwood forest on a sprawling 12-acre estate along the Mendocino Coast. The towering trees establish a sense o...

Interior and Exterior Auto Detailing with Optional Headlight Restoration at Rich's Smog & Repair (Up to 65% Off)

Gas-powered cars will soon be replaced by electric cars, which will be replaced by two-person motorcycles powered by nightmares. Care for your car while you can with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $69 for a detailing pac...

$14 for Extra-Large Specialty Pizza or Pizza with Up to Five Toppings and a 2-Liter Soda (Up to $27.89 Value)

Pizza is ubiquitous in American culture, thanks solely to its ability to double as a fraction calculator. Indulge in a numerator with this Groupon. $14 for an Extra-Large Pizza with Up to Five Toppings and a 2-Liter Soda (Up to $27...

$100 to Spend on Seafood Delivered to Your Door at Kanaloa Seafood

For more than 30 years, the Bay Area's top restaurants and hotels have partnered with Kanaloa Seafood to get the ocean's best fare -- and with this deal, the same fresh catches can be delivered right to your home: • $50 for $100 ...

Mobile Interior or Exterior Auto Detailing at WaterLess Touch

Be kind to both your ride and the environment when you drive away with this deal from WaterLess Touch. Their special eco-friendly wash formula saves up to 150 gallons of water per wash: • $59 ($119 value) for mobile interior or e...

Three Private Pilates Sessions at EHS Pilates

The motivating, friendly, and experienced instructors at this popular and pleasantly sunny Mission studio will provide guidance to help you tighten your core, work your whole body, and have fun: • $90 ($212 value) for three 50-mi...

One or Three Chemical Peels or 20 Units of Botox at Pleasanton Allergy and Dermatology

The board-certified physicians at this Pleasanton med spa have been serving the Tri-Valley for more than 40 years -- so yeah, they know a thing or two about helping you look radiant. • $49 ($100 value) for one chemical peel • $1...

Two-Hour Introductory Flight Lesson at California Airways

A real adventure can give you a whole new perspective on life -- in this case, a bird's. Take the skies experience the thrill of flying with this offer from California Airways: • $149 ($298 value) for a two-hour introductory flig...

Three or Six Vouchers for $10 Worth of Mexican at El Tesoro Taqueria & Grill & Grill (Up to 52% Off)

Tacos are portable, which makes them the ideal food for street vendors, busy people, and anyone thinking about running away from their family. Chow down with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for three vouchers, each v...

Mexican Fare at Nikko's Mexican Grill (Up to 52% Off). Two Options Available.

Most Mexican dishes come paired with beans and rice, which balance out spicy flavors and serve as the mortar needed to build your cathedral of tacos. Eat a beautiful meal with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for thre...

$160 for 20 Units of Botox or 60 Units of Dysport at Essential Aesthetics (Up to a $420 Value)

Wrinkles form by growing older, furrowing the brow excessively, or forgetting to fold your face properly before bed. Iron out the creases with this Groupon. $160 for 20 Units of Botox or 60 Units of Dysport (Up to a $420 Value) Me...

$17 for One Dozen Cupcakes at Just Cakin' It Cakery & Dessert Bar (Up to $35.40 Value)

What they lack in size, cupcakes make up for in cuteness, portability, and their ability to hide inside larger cakes. Keep track of compact morsels with this Groupon. $17 for One Dozen Cupcakes (Up to $35.40 Value) Choose from any...

Ethiopian Meal for Two or Four at Ethiopia Restaurant in Berkeley (Up to 57% Off)

Group dining is an easy way to socialize and to encourage friends to accept the mouth growing on your back. Show off party tricks with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $20 for an Ethiopian meal for two (up to a $41 total v...

Rancho Palos Verdes 5-Star Resort at Terranea Resort

Escape Kit • A One-Night Stay for Two in a Resort-View Guest Room ($249 per Night) • Or, a One-Night Stay for Two in an Ocean-View Guest Room ($319 per Night) • Or, a Three-Night Stay for Up to Four People in a Two-Bedroom Cas...

$60 Toward Boutique Clothing and Accessories at Specialtees Boutique

Bay Area fashion is fun, sophisticated, and eclectic -- and so is the inventory at this Erin Paige boutique, which has been helping women look fabulous for more than 30 years. Land some seriously chic fashion with this deal: • $3...

One or Three Microdermabrasions at Le Charm Beautique

From the warm, welcoming atmosphere to the smooth, silky feel of your post-treatment skin, everything about this experience is sure to charm: • $55 ($110 value) for one microdermabrasions • $165 ($330 value) for three microderma...

One or Two Auto-Detailing Packages at Premier Auto Collision (Up to 59% Off)

Auto detailing can help emphasize your car's best features, from a custom hood ornament to the words "cool car" keyed onto the hood. Stop traffic with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $79 for one auto detail (a $180 value...

$79 for Eyelash Extensions at Cherry Blossom Salon ($180 Value)

Unlike campaigning politicians, people with eyelash extensions gain favor when they end each statement with a dramatic wink. Let your lashes do the talking with this Groupon. $79 for Eyelash Extensions ($180 Value) A technician ad...

$99 for a High-Speed Drive in a Ferrari or Lamborghini from Gotham Dream Cars ($249 Value). Two Options Available.

Riding a fancy car provides a brief taste of luxury without outrageous monthly payments or the responsibility of refilling its caviar tank every day. Experience automotive extravagance with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options ...

Bread-Making Class for One or Two at Sour Flour (Up to 53% Off)

Good bakers are like the sun, in that they rise early each morning, heat things up, and commute to work on a chariot. Learn the trade with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for a bread-making class ($80 value) $75 fo...

Three or Five Facials at Vanity Chair Beauty Salon (Up to 65% Off)

A beautiful face can command the attention of a room, much like the announcement that you have declared yourself room commander. Get noticed with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for any three facials (up to a $135 va...

10 or 20 Gym Visits with Fitness Classes at LifeStyleRx (Up to 90% Off)

Sit-ups remain one of the best methods of reshaping the abdomen, second only to standing in front of a lit cannon. Enjoy explosive exercise with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $25 for 10 group exercise classes (up to a ...

Portrait Packages with Three-Image CD and Prints or Gallery-Wrap at jcp portraits (Up to 83% Off)

Family portraits are great for remembering special occasions, such as the arrival of a new baby or that time everyone just happened to wear the same pantsuit. Capture the moment with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $25 fo...

Chocolate-Making Class for One or Two at Rachel Dunn Chocolates (55% Off)

Learning a new skill is useful, especially if it means a promotion to a front-of-the-horse costume. Go to the head of the class with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $25 for a chocolate-making class for one (a $55 value) ...

16-Day Slim Down Program or Four-Week Boot Camp at Brien Shamp's Boot Camps (Up to 87% Off)

Exercising with friends allows you to morally support each other, and, when the time comes, to have the collective muscle to beat up an asteroid headed for Earth. Get strength in numbers with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Option...

Hair-Smoothing Keratin Treatment, or Haircut with Partial Highlights at Lisa's Beauty Salon (Up to 55% Off)

A well-kept mane exudes health and beauty, or at the very least distracts from a chronic case of jazz hands. Master the art of misdirection with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $120 for one hair-smoothing keratin treatme...

$15 for Three Groupons, Each Good for $10 Worth of Italian Food at Cinecittà Ristorante & Bar ($30 Total Value)

Eating at home can save money, but if you don't leave the house you'll never meet a rich stranger who will give you all his money in return for raising his adult children. Get out there with this Groupon. $15 for Three Groupons, Ea...

$50 for a Two-Hour Introductory Surfing Lesson at University of Surfing ($100 Value)

The first rule of surfing is to look at where you want to go, rather than at the angry merman climbing onto your board. Learn the second rule with this Groupon. $50 for a Two-Hour Introductory Surfing Lesson ($100 Value) The veter...

Full Set of Eyelash Extensions with Optional Refill and Collagen Eye Treatment at ModVellum (Up to 67% Off)

Eyelashes can be surprisingly seductive, especially considering they are hair growing around your eyes. Get flirtatious follicles with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $89 for a full set of natural or dramatic eyelash exten...

Gourmet Pot Pies and Crepes at The Cravery (Half Off). Three Options Available.

People love eating at restaurants because the food is as delicious as a home-cooked meal, but you don't have to eat at a table with your 14 strong, hungry teenage brothers. Get some eating room with this Groupon. Choose from Three ...

Self-Guided Tandem Kayaking for Two or Rafting for Up to Six on Stanislaus River from River Journey (Up to 55% Off)

Herbert Hoover won America's hearts and votes when he promised a college-educated chicken in every pot and a kayak in every garage. Get a taste of the American dream with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $30 for a self-gu...

Two or Four Adult Tickets or One-Year Family Membership to Oakland Aviation Museum (Half Off)

The history of aviation is full of singular achievements that changed the course of history, such as the day Wilbur Wright figured out how to grill steaks on the engine of his biplane. Learn more about great aviators with this Group...

One or Two 60-Minute Thai, Swedish, or Deep Tissue Massages at Sofitel Massage (Up to 51% Off)

Massages loosen up muscles so they can be limber enough to perform complex tasks such as chimney sweeping or limbo-pole breaking. Break up your tension with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for one 60-minute Thai, Sw...

One, Three, or Six Silk Peels at Premier Dermatology (Up to 59% Off)

Diamonds are the hardest rock known to man, and only they could blast off old skin cells without shedding a single tear. Say goodbye to the old you with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $99 for one SilkPeel (a $200 value...

$129 for a Zoom! Teeth-Whitening Treatment at Avalon Dental ($600 Value)

The perfect human would have sparkling-white teeth, minty-fresh breath, and can openers for hands. Get as close to perfection as possible with this Groupon. $129 for a Zoom! Teeth-Whitening Treatment ($600 Value) In a process that...

Costa Rican Resort at Hotel Leyenda

The Escape Kit • A Four- ($779), Five- ($879), Six- ($979), or Seven-Night ($1,079) Stay for Two in a Jungle Forest Suite • Welcome Bottle of Wine and Fresh Fruit Upon Arrival • Daily Breakfast and Dinner with Drinks • Choice of...

Bahamas Luxury Resort at Grand Isle Resort & Spa

Escape Kit • A Four-Night ($959) or Six-Night ($1,439) Stay for Two in a One-Bedroom Garden-View Villa between May 28 and December 20, 2013 • Or, a Four-Night ($1,679) or Six-Night ($2,519) Stay for Up to Four Guests in a Two-Bedr...

All-Inclusive Dominican Resort at Be Live Grand Marien

The Escape Kit • A Three- ($369), Four- ($525), or Five-Night ($655) Stay for Two in a Superior Deluxe Room • All Inclusive of Meals, Alcoholic and Non-Alcoholic Beverages, Taxes, and Fees • Combine Unlimited Vouchers for an Exte...

Senior Portrait Session + Grad Announcement Cards at Captured Moments by Denise

This mom-meets-professional-photographer prides herself on her comforting demeanor and ability to inspire her clients' most sincere expressions -- making this seasoned shutterbug the perfect person to capture this very important mom...

Three Drop-In Mommy and Baby Yoga Classes at It's Yoga Kids

This airy, light-filled Presidio studio is the perfect place to bond with your baby or toddler while losing those post-natal pounds with stress-relieving Vinyasa poses in 45- to 60-minute sessions: • $30 ($60 value) for three dro...

Two-Hour Open Jump Pass at Jump Highway

With tons of springy trampolines, a designated high-flying basketball zone, and a cushy foam fit, it's pretty hard for the entire family not to have smiles plastered on their faces -- and nearly 5,000 Facebook fans agree. Get in on ...

Three-Course Prix-Fixe Meal and Wine for Two or Four at Velvet Room at the Clift Hotel (51% Off)

Going out to a restaurant with your family is a great way to catch up and an even better way to prove to your parents that you've finally learned to eat without screaming between bites. Reveal the new you with this Groupon. Choose ...

Soul Food at Touch of Soul (Half Off). Two Options Available.

Soul food, like soul music, often inspires involuntary handclaps and shouts of appreciation from deep inside the belly. Get clapping with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $19.50 for three vouchers, each good for $13 worth...

Three or Six Groupons, Each Good for $10 Worth of Deli Food at Danville International Market

Delis rely on a number system to maintain order in their lines, a vast improvement over the former method: assigning customers the names of distant galaxies, and serving them in order of cosmic age. Queue up with this Groupon. Choo...

Margaritas and Baseball Experience at Tres at Tres

Just because our home team is away, doesn't mean we have to stay home to watch the game. With this offer, you can catch San Francisco take to the diamond and make a night of it with a margarita-making demo, cocktails, and tacos at T...

Air-Duct Cleaning Package at First Duct Cleaning

An air-duct cleaning can make entering your home like taking a breath of fresh air -- and lower energy bills, too. The dryer vent cleaning can help reduce the risk of fires, and the camera inspection before and after service ensures...

Western States Horse Expo: One-Day Pass at Western States Horse Expo

Saddle up for a day with some of the most exciting equines around the world with this offer from the Western States Horse Expo, held June 7 to 9: For $9 ($18 value), score a one-day adult pass -- good for ages 13 and older. Known th...

$15 for $30 Worth of Beauty Products and Tools at Peninsula Beauty in San Francisco

Early humans used their natural surroundings as cosmetics, tinting their lips with berries and inviting actual bees to live inside their beehive hairdos. Create a buzz around your look with this Groupon. $15 for $30 Worth of Beauty...

Barbecued Meats, Teriyaki Bowls, and More at J & J Hawaiian Barbecue (Up to 52% Off). Two Options Available.

Dining out leaves you with a full stomach, fond memories, and pockets full of restaurant smell to take home to your kids. Enjoy appetizing aromas with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for three $10 vouchers (a $30 val...

Full Set of Mink Eyelash Extensions with Optional Touchup Visit at WINK in Walnut Creek (Up to 75% Off)

Long lashes are a symbol of glamour, unlike short lashes, which are an indication that a person leans in too close to fires. Get smoldering glances with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $75 for a full set of mink eyelash ...

Two Hours of Trampoline Jump Time for Two or Four at Great Jump Sports (Up to 55% Off)

Play time gives children a welcome respite from the daily grind of selling life insurance to their action figures. Help your little nine-to-fivers let their hair down with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $22 for two hour...

Two or Four Visits or One-Year Individual or Family Membership to UC Botanical Garden at Berkeley (Up to 55% Off)

For thousands of years, humans have studied trees to learn how they too can provide suitable housing for squirrels and grow lemons from their fingertips. Branch out with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $10 for two weekday ...

$15 for $30 Worth of Billiards at Jillian's

Billiards are a good way to burn time you would have otherwise spent staring into space or teaching your children manners. Get busy with this Groupon. $15 for $30 Worth of Billiards Tables go for $9 per hour daily from 11 a.m.–4...

Bowling at Homestead Lanes (Up to 52% Off). Two Options Available.

Bowling is a model for interpersonal relationships—the ball is your scream and the pins are other people's opinions. Make a striking statement with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for $30 worth of bowling $29 for ...

60- or 90-Minute Massage at Crow Canyon Chiropractic in San Ramon (Up to 68% Off)

A massage releases stress more peacefully than primal-scream therapy and more discreetly than a highly televised bulldozer rampage. Find an appropriate outlet with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for one 60-minute ma...

Regular or Large Sandwich Meal with Drink, or $ 5 for $ 10 Worth of Fresh Sandwiches, Flatbreads, and Salads at Quiznos

When a sandwich is too big, it can be held together with a toothpick or blended into a purée and spread between two pieces of bread. Keep it together with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $8.99 for two regular combo meals...

One or Three Oil Changes at Auto 360 (Up to 53% Off)

Like children, cars require regular check-ups and a daily roll call to make sure all four wheels are present. Take attendance under the hood with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $17 for one oil change (a $34.99 value) $4...

Facials at San Francisco Institute of Esthetics and Cosmetology (Up to 52% Off). Three Options Available.

Facials with antioxidants reduce the signs of aging and are less time consuming than scolding each pore for having another birthday. Treat your face right with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $29 for one AGE Smart anti-ag...

Wine Tasting for Two or Four with a Take-Home Bottle for Each at Mountain View Winery (Up to 74% Off)

If grapes could talk, they'd recount their dreams, the first time they got plucked, and the first time they felt victimized by nature's rumor mill—the vine. Taste the tales of the grape with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Optio...

Five Cake-Decorating Classes for One or Two at Sugar 'n Spice (Up to 60% Off)

Learning something new requires clearing space in your head, which is best accomplished by sneezing out brain cells until you can't remember cursive. Make room for new skills with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $55 for ...

One Brazilian Wax or Three Brazilian Waxes with Depilar Treatments at Stript Wax Bar (Up to 52% Off)

Most people think that there's no use for warm wax other than as a spreadable topping to make sandwiches more awful. Put wax to work with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $30 for one Brazilian wax (up to a $60 value) $180...

One, Two, or Three Microdermabrasion Treatments at Mayflower Beauty Spa (Up to 56% Off)

A radiant complexion is proof that the internal organs are working well including the hamster that runs in the heart’s hamster wheel. Glow from the outside in with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for one 90-minute ...

One or Three Massages with Chiropractic Exam at Smith Chiropractic (Up to 93% Off)

Muscles, like holiday lights, can easily get in knots but garner lots of attention when displayed at parties. Put a twinkle in their eye with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for a chiropractic package (up to a $410 to...

$79 for a 45-Minute Diamond-Peel Microdermabrasion and Crystal Collagen Mask at Oasis Day Spa ($165 Value)

Smooth skin is beautiful skin, which is why most supermodels are actually just faces painted on helium balloons. Flatten out facial flaws with this Groupon. $79 for a 45-Minute Diamond-Peel Microdermabrasion and Crystal Collagen Ma...

Haircut with Glaze, Full Color, or Ombre Color at Lavish Hair & Makeup (Up to 59% Off)

A haircut can make a head feel lighter, just like taking off a winter hat or taking out the parts of your brain you really don’t need. Free your mind with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $49 for a haircut and glaze (a ...

One- or Three-Month Gym Membership with Fitness Classes and a Personal-Training Session at Body Kinetics (Up to 77% Off)

Bodybuilders often say "no pain, no gain," which is why so many of them start their workouts by crashing through a window at the gym. Feel it all over with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for a one-month membership pac...

Custom Framing at Photograph & Frame (Up to 60% Off). Two Options Available.

Both a framed work of art and a finicky antique cannon add a lot of personality to a living room at the simple expense of a few holes in the wall. Maximize aesthetics while minimizing structural damage with this Groupon. Choose Bet...

60- or 90-Minute Swedish Massage at Natina Day Spa (Up to 53% Off)

Getting a massage when your muscles ache is a no-brainer, like signing a guy named Michael Bestseller to a publishing contract. You can't go wrong with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for a 60-minute Swedish massage ...

"Sylvia": Ticket at Independent Cabaret Productions

We've all heard three's a crowd -- but what about when the third party happens to be a cute canine? Find out with this offer from Independent Cabaret Productions: For $22 ($45 value), you'll get one General Admission ticket to a per...

60-Minute Thai Massage or 60- or 90-Minute Swedish Couples Massage at Voilà La Familia (Up to 67% Off)

Without massages, shoulders would stiffen into immobility and fall victim to freeloading parrots and the burden of carrying Earth's heavyset brother, Girth. Pamper your perches with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for ...

$12 for Two Groupons, Each Good for $12 Worth of Health-Conscious Food at Freshii ($24 Value)

Though its popularity is waning, fast food will always be remembered for how it led America to victory in the 1996 Olympic hamburger relays. Reminisce over a healthy meal with this Groupon. $12 for Two Groupons, Each Good for $12 W...

Six or Ten $5 Punch Cards at La Val's Pizza of Albany (Half Off)

A large pizza is the perfect meal for a family to enjoy together, but is more often a meal for one man to enjoy alone. You're not alone when you're with pizza with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for six $5 punch car...

One or Three Private Horseback-Riding Lessons at Zia Ranch Horsemanship Program (Up to 52% Off)

Horses are mankind's natural companion, whether helping humans establish an agrarian society or stomping out the fledgling agrarian societies of our rabbit rivals. Stay on top with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $22 for...

One or Three New Moon Facials at Victoria's TLC Skin Care (Up to 56% Off)

Like an English lady's hat catching fire at a garden party, healthy skin is positively glowing. Refine your look with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for one New Moon facial (a $75 value) $99 for three New Moon facia...

Breakfast for Two or $28.98 for $60 Worth of Mexican and Caribbean Food at Estrada's Mexican & Caribbean Restaurant

Eating nutritious food is one of the top requirements for survival, ranking just below drinking water and just above not eating rocks painted to look like nutritious food. Taste the real thing with this Groupon. Choose Between Two ...

Platinum Car Wash with Rain-X or Interior Detail with Seal-Tek Wax at Hesperian 100% Hand Carwash (Up to 52% Off)

Like slapping a politician across the face, writing "wash me" on the back window of a dirty car is an open invitation to duel. Avoid conflict with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $19 for a platinum car wash (up to a $39.9...

Haircut and Blow-Dry Style with Optional Root Touchup or All-Over Color at 17 Jewels Salon + Spa (Up to 62% Off)

Each of the Beatles received much attention for his mop-top hairstyle due to its unconventional length and its ability to play the drums better than Ringo. Love, love your 'do to this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $19 for a...

$179 for an In-Office Zoom! Teeth Whitening at Bonita Dental Care ($500 Value)

A bright smile sends a message to others, such as "I care about dental hygiene" or "Look at my teeth—I didn't eat your jelly." Say it with a smile, thanks to this Groupon. $179 for an In-Office Zoom! Teeth Whitening ($500 Value) ...

60-Minute Massage with Fruit and Cheese Plates and Beverages for One or Two at Anew Day Spa (Up to 51% Off)

Relaxation is one of the elemental forces that keeps human bodies alive, alongside air, water, fire, and antifire. Ease into your element with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $47 for a massage package for one (a $95 value...

5 or 10 Pop-In Playtime Visits to Pump It Up (Up to 55% Off)

Children are full of energy, which is why they love to run around and are often named after local coal plants. Watch little Municipal Plant 7 burn off some steam with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $19 for 5 pop-in play...

1 Month of Flower Arrangement Deliveries at Cherry Florist

Brighten up your home with fresh, gorgeous flowers for a whole month with this offer from Vallejo's family-owned-and-operated florist: • $45 ($100 value) for one month of bi-weekly flower arrangements • Get two medium-sized arra...

$25 for Two-Hour Introductory Kiteboarding Lesson at Helm of Sun Valley ($60 Value)

Before man conquered his fear of water, he amused himself with dust sports such as pushing boulders off cliffs, wrestling tumbleweeds, and falling in the dust. Conquer the big blue with this Groupon. $25 for an Introductory Kiteboa...

Italian-Style Pizza, Subs, and Salads at Marco's Pizza (Half Off). Two Options Available.

Communal dining is easy when the food is already divided, like a presliced pizza or a turkey that has already been through a protracted custody battle. Split and share with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for $30 wor...

$169 for 20 Units of Botox or 60 Units of Dysport at Serenity MedSpa ($340 Value)

Sagging skin makes you look older, which is why it's so coveted by teenagers. Look youthful with this Groupon. $169 for 20 Units of Botox or 60 Units of Dysport ($340 Value) Botox and Dysport injections relax the muscles and help ...

$15 for Italian Dinner for Two with Entrees and Wine at Luigi's (Up to $31.80 Value)

While most people know that Italy is shaped like a boot, few realize that Sicily is shaped like an island. Explore the world with this Groupon. $15 for Italian Dinner for Two (Up to $31.80 Total Value) Two entrees (up to an $11.9...

One or Three Swedish Massages with Aromatherapy or Hot-Stone Massages at Absolute Bliss Massage Therapy (Up to 58% Off)

Similar to old pennies, environmental toxins are ubiquitous, harmful if swallowed, and may contain trace amounts of Abraham Lincoln. Feel good head to tails with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $35 for one 60-minute Swedis...

Pampering Mani-Pedi, Facial, or Both at Topps Salon Day Spa (Up to 57% Off)

Stress is to blame for everything from the stomach ulcers that take the fun out of eating to the forehead veins that take the fun out of head-butting. Keep calm with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $35 for a pampering man...

Three or Six $10 Vouchers for Mexican Food at Opera Plaza Deli & Taqueria (Up to 52% Off)

Dining out with young children can be a challenge, especially when they won't stop playing with their food or mispronouncing "bouillabaisse." Enjoy a family meal with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for three $10 vou...

One or Two Advanced-IPL Photo-Rejuvenation Treatments for Face and Neck at Salon Elizabeth (Up to 59% Off)

There are plenty of little things you can do to ward off wrinkles, such as getting a facial or refusing to laugh at your child's jokes. Take your skin seriously with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $129 for one advanced ...

$69 for a Two-Hour Mini Detail on a Car, Truck, or SUV at Luxury Detail in San Carlos ($150 Value)

Like clothing, cars can be hand-washed or machine-washed before getting thrown into the dryer. Consult your vehicle's care label before using this Groupon. $69 for a Two-Hour Mini Detail on a Car, Truck, or SUV ($150 Value) After ...

5 or 10 Classes at Yoga Tree (Up to 74% Off)

Choose Between Two Options $29 for 5 yoga classes (an $80 value) $39 for 10 yoga classes (a $150 value) Experienced instructors lead yoga classes that range from traditional hatha yoga to more specialized styles, including vinya...

Shellac Manicure with Optional Rockstar Shellac Pedicure at Nails by Tami (51% Off)

Fingernails come in handy when peeling stickers, scratching lottery tickets, or slicing open locked drawers to get to your nail clippers. Polish your fingertip toolkit with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $17 for a Shell...

Three or Six Groupons, Each Good for $10 Worth of Burgers and Chinese Food at FireWok Express (Up to 52% Off).

Dining out leaves you with a full stomach, fond memories, and pockets full of restaurant smell to take home to your kids. Enjoy appetizing aromas with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for three Groupons, each good for...

$259 for Sunset or Sunday Brunch Cruise for Up to Six at Bay View Charters (Up to $541 Value)

Boats are like rich parents, in that they will float you for a few years while you drift around playing acoustic guitar and working on your coming-of-age novel. Live the dream with this Groupon. $259 for a Sunset Cruise or Brunch C...

$37 for 60-Minute Swedish Massage with Igor Volfovskiy at Beauty Spa by Ereeda ($75 Value)

Getting a massage is an effective way to relax, much like dipping your feet into a warm box of puppies. Immerse yourself in comfort with this Groupon. $37 for a 60-Minute Swedish Massage ($75 Value) For 60-minutes, massage therapi...

Two or Four Salsa Classes for One or Four Salsa Classes for Two at Dance SF (Up to 70% Off)

After extensive testing, scientists determined their sentient dance machine’s “killer moves” were, in fact, as harmful to humans as they were to sound. Keep dancing safely within mankind with this Groupon. Choose from Three O...

Cell Phone Accessories at Mobili Wireless (Up to 52% Off). Two Options Available.

Alexander Graham Bell wanted the word “ahoy” to be the official telephone greeting, largely because he invented the telephone to play long-distance games of Battleship. Make your phone at hit with this Groupon. Choose Between ...

21 Days or 6 Weeks of Unlimited Boot-Camp Sessions at Fit Body Boot Camp (Up to 85% Off)

Exercise keeps the body in peak condition, which explains the marbleized ThighMaster lying next to Michelangelo's David. Enjoy an anatomical renaissance with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for 21 days of unlimited f...

One- or Three-Day Summer Surf Camp for Kids at Stinson Beach Surf Camps (Up to 61% Off)

Surfing is full of its own fun terminology, such as "hang ten" and "I am Poseidon incarnate and I rule these seas." Be a superhuman surfer with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for a one-day kids summer surf camp (a $...

Two or Four Months of Unlimited Bikram Yoga Classes at Bikram Yoga in the Mission (83% Off)

Hot yoga can only be performed in a temperature-controlled studio or a car that's been sitting in the mall parking lot all summer. Get hot with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for two months of unlimited classes (a $...

10 or 20 Groupons, Each Good for $5 Worth of Mediterranean Food at Cello Kebab & Pizza

Mediterranean restaurants adhere closely to tradition, thanks to the generations of poets who memorized and recited takeout menus in public squares. Enjoy an oral tradition with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $25 for 10...

Acupuncture Session with Optional 30- or 60-Minute Massage at Be Well Integral Healing Space in Oakland (Up to 76% Off)

Acupuncture is an ancient method of pain relief, improving upon the more ancient technique of clubbing your friend so they forget that they were bitten by a dinosaur. Free your mind with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $...

Three or Five $10 Vouchers for Breakfast and Lunch Fare at The Village Café (Half Off)

Breakfast became popular after we finally figured out how we could make food out of that goo inside of eggs. Rise and dine with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for three $10 vouchers for American breakfast and lunch ...

Two or Four Electro-Slim Body-Sculpting Treatments at ForeViva Medical Clinique (Up to 78% Off)

Modern spa treatments help people stay beautiful without having to spend years in a dark room to keep their skin fresh. Get out there with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for two Electro-Slim body-sculpting treatment...

$59 for a Facial for Mom at Veronika Michaels Skin Studio ($150 Value)

Poets call the eyes the windows to the soul, just as they call the face the weird rubbery house of the soul. Smooth your siding with this Groupon. $59 for One 60-minute Facial for Mom ($150 value) The Facial for Mom softens fine l...

One or Two 60-Minute Myofascial Restructure Massages with Cody Morris at Back 2 Perfect (Up to 70% Off)

Chronic back pain can make it hard to perform vital work functions, such as fixing a printer or hauling a sack of money to the agreed-upon warehouse. Get the job done with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for one 60-m...

Pan, Deep-Dish, and Specialty Pizzas at San Francisco Pizza (Half Off). Two Options Available.

Ordering pizza is a Friday-night tradition, along with telling stories about pizza and balling up slices of pizza and playing pizzaball. Dial up some fun with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $10 for $20 worth of pizza an...

Downtown Bike Tour + Dinner with Redd's Apple Ale at Bikes + Burgers + Beers: LivingSocial Original

Strap on your riding helmut and get ready to see Chicago in a whole new way with this LivingSocial Original Production: a bike tour through downtown with dinner and drinks in partnership with Redd's Apple Ale. Pay $35 (regularly ...

BBQ + Beer + Bluegrass picked by Redd's Apple Ale at BBQ + Beer + Bluegrass: LivingSocial Original

When the weather gets warm, there's little better than delicious grub, crisp drinks, and live music -- except maybe all three at the same time. Score the ultimate springtime surprise with this offer: a barbecue, beer, and bluegrass ...

Scenic Bike Tour + Lunch + Beer at Bikes + Lunch + Beer: LivingSocial Original

Strap on your riding helmet and get ready to see the outdoors in a whole new way with this LivingSocial Original Production: a 25-mile scenic bike tour with lunch and a post-trail beer. Join our LivingSocial staff outside of the ...

One Facial Peel or Microdermabrasion, or Three Facial Peels at Epizen (51% Off)

Clogged pores cause acne and blemishes and make it harder to absorb your tears into your face for later re-crying. Open up with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $59 for one facial peel or microdermabrasion treatment (a $1...

Two, Four, or Six Eyebrow Waxes with Complimentary Wine or $25 for $50 Worth of Any Waxing Services at My Angel Nails

There aren't many advantages to having lots of body hair, other than clogging the shower drain so pythons can't slither through it. Get slippery with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $12 for two eyebrow waxes and two compli...

10 or 20 CrossFit Classes at Genesis Fitness (Up to 77% Off)

Choose Between Two Options $39 for 10 CrossFit classes (up to a $150 value) $69 for 20 CrossFit classes (up to a $300 value) Trainers change exercises daily, the only consistent pillars of class being the high level of intensity...

60-Minute Massage or Couples Massage with Hydrotherapy and Complimentary Champagne at Andalusia Day Spa (Up to 57% Off)

Stress accumulates in muscles after they spend hours hunched over keyboards, running on treadmills, and hurling jars of marmalade at city officials. Loosen up with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $99 for a couples massage...

Two, Four, or Six Eyebrow Waxes with Glasses of Wine or $25 for $50 Worth of Waxing at Aveida Nail Salon

There aren't many advantages to having lots of body hair, other than clogging the shower drain so pythons can't slither through it. Get slippery with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $14 for two eyebrow waxes and two compli...

Terminator Too" Live Parody with Redd's Apple Ale at "Terminator Too"

Everyone's favorite '90s action movie comes back to life with this offer, presented in partnership with Redd's Apple Ale: Snag yourself a seat at Terminator Too, the hilarious interactive live theater parody of the sci-fi blockbuste...

Emerging Artists Concert Series at Concert Series at 918 F Street

In case you missed out on our sold-out shows last year at LivingSocial's 918 F Street, now's your chance to get in on the action and check out some talented groups perform in one of DC's best music spaces. Enter: a new concert serie...

Lamp-Making Class at Gil Stancourt Lighting Studio

Gil has been building, restoring, and rewiring lighting for more than 25 years -- but he doesn't really consider it a job. For Gil, tinkering with lamps is his passion and he loves sharing it with others: • $59 ($125 value) for a...

Sunset Kayaking + Appetizers with Redd's Apple Ale at Sunset Kayaking & Apps: LivingSocial Original

True to its glacial roots, Lake Union is the perfect place to slow things down and enjoy a lazy Seattle evening. Head to the lake for this perfectly paced adventure in partnership with Redd's Apple Ale: A guided sunset kayaking tou...

Sunset Kayak + Dinner with Redd's Apple Ale at Sunset Kayak Adventure + Dinner: LivingSocial Original

When you feeling like you're up a creek in our concrete city, hit the open water and relax with this offer: an hour-long inflatable sunset kayak adventure followed by a delicious Mexican-style dinner at Wahoo's Fish Tacos in partner...

Horseback Riding + Cookout with Redd's Apple Ale at Horseback Riding: LivingSocial Original

Strap on your cowboy boots and get ready for a high falutin' hoedown when you saddle up to this offer for a horseback ride followed by either a catered lunch or a western-style cookout party, complete with round-trip transportation ...

Acrylic-Nail Refill, or One or Two Manicures with Signature Hot Stone Spa Pedicures at Bayview Salon (Up to 53% Off)

A mani-pedi can add a touch of flair to any look, much like sewing shiny silverware onto your favorite shirt. Look sharp with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $35 for one Shellac Gel manicure and signature hot stone spa pe...

Mexican Dinner for Two or Four with Appetizer, Entrees, and Dessert at Regalito Rosticeria (Up to 47% Off)

Mexican chefs are known for their mastery over color and heat, unlike vanilla-pudding producers or whoever's responsible for cooking snow. Savor the work of a spice specialist with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $30 for ...

50- or 80-Minute Massage at Oakland Massage Therapy (Up to 59% Off). Three Options Available.

Giving yourself a back massage is impossible, much like keeping your eyes open while sneezing or reading an entire book. Give spines a rest with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for a 50-minute Swedish, deep-tissue, pr...

Partial, Natural, or Full Eyelash-Extension Set at iCandy Eye Salon (Up to 56% Off)

Long lashes are a symbol of glamour, unlike short lashes, which are an indication that a person leans in too close to fires. Get smoldering glances with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $35 for a partial eyelash-extension ...

$10 for $20 Worth of Thai Food at Tub Tim Thai Restaurant

A delicious meal typically requires advance preparation, adherence to a recipe, and your third and final genie wish. Save the third wish for more wishes with this Groupon. $10 for $20 Worth of Thai Cuisine The lunch and dinner men...

Mediterranean Dinner for Two or Four with Hot and Cold Mezza and Baklava at Tannourine Restaurant (Up to 55% Off)

A kebab skewer remains useful even after a meal, whether as an impromptu toothpick or as a prop in a diorama about the life of a favorite pole-vaulter. Give your taste buds a lift with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $28 ...

One or Two Private Golf Lessons with Video Swing Analysis at NorCal Golf Academy (Up to 70% Off)

Without an instructor's outside opinion, golfers would never know about the hitch in their swing or the thousands of centipedes writhing on their backs. See things differently with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $95 for...

Pizza Meal with Chicken Wings or Salads and Sodas for Two or Four at Extreme Pizza (Up to 51% Off)

Like a good house, a good pizza accommodates an entire family, can be decorated however you like, and is carpeted with warm, chewy dough. Build a meal from the ground up with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $12 for a pizz...

$15 for Bowling and Shoe Rental for Two at Albany Bowl (Up to $30 Value)

Professional bowlers bowl not forcefully but gingerly, lending the ball spin and preserving the unhatched robin eggs inside every pin. Strike softly with this Groupon. $15 for Bowling Two (Up to $30 Value) Two games of bowling pe...

One or Two 60-Minute Massages and One Optional Chiropractic Exam with Two Adjustments at SoulWorks (Up to 82% Off)

The human spine is a whole made up of many smaller parts, like a jigsaw puzzle or the neighborhood skull tower. Align your spine with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $45 for one 60-minute Swedish or deep-tissue massage, ...

Haircut, Blowout, and Style with Option for All-Over Color or Partial Highlights at Donna Salon (Up to 53% Off)

Most people value you for what is on the outside, except for dogs, who can smell that you are full of bones. Upgrade your outsides with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $19 for a haircut, blowout, and style (a $40 value) ...

Brow Wax and Tint with an Optional Mini Facial at Love Your Face (Up to 60% Off)

Well-groomed eyebrows draw attention toward your eyes and away from the fact that you’re only wearing half a horse costume. Be captivating with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $28 for an eyebrow wax and tint (up to a $...

Two, Four, or Six Kids Art or Play Classes at Kidz Luv It Here (Up to 62% Off)

Without extracurricular activities, children will take up sedentary pastimes, such as playing video games or baseball. Get them up and moving with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $29 for two Arty Crafty or Play Smart clas...

15-Day or 5-Week Boot Camp Program from AbFitTraining (Up to 82% Off)

Working out triggers a release of endorphins, leading to decreased levels of stress and increased yearnings for stairs, stairs, more stairs. Keep climbing with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for a 15-day Get Fit boo...

$59 for a Dental Exam, Cleaning, and X-Rays at Luxor Dental ($350 Value)

Your smile is one of your biggest assets, which is why many people only smile in the privacy of a bank vault. Keep your stock up with this Groupon. $59 for a Dental Exam, Cleaning, and X-Rays ($350 Value) The dental team assesses...

One, Three, or Five Slimming Body Wraps at Wellness Within (Up to 67% Off)

According to historians, the earliest body wrap consisted only of tree bark, honey, and an excitable boa constrictor. Embrace—and be embraced by—progress with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for one slimming bo...

Six or Twelve $5 Vouchers for Bottles of Wine at Fat Grape Winery (Up to 52% Off)

Many people are intimidated by wine's subtle flavors and endless varieties, but did you know that it's actually just juice made from vodka-infused grapes? Learn other things my cousin told me about with this Groupon. Choose Between...

Mexican Food for Two or Four at Estrellita Restaurant (Up to 53% Off)

Salt makes a margarita good and a lime makes it better, but it's the tequila that makes it worth not sharing with anyone. Get away from my margarita with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $10 for $20 worth of Mexican food ...

Badminton for Two or Four with Rental Rackets at Bay Badminton Center (Up to 65% Off)

Athleticism is more than leaping over a hurdle and drop-kicking a computer after it beats you in chess. Be a good sport with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $16 for a badminton outing for two (up to a $40 total value) D...

$10 for $20 Worth of Southern Soul Food at Gussie's Chicken and Waffles

Combining breakfast and dinner ingredients can confuse amateur chefs, resulting in waffles shaped like T-bones and spaghetti noodles served in bowls with milk. Enjoy a proper breakfast-dinner hybrid with this Groupon. $10 for $20 W...

$95 Five-Hour Competition BBQ Cooking Class from Big Jim's BBQ in San Rafael ($240 Value)

Barbecuing, like painting, usually entails the use of a brush, a master's touch, and the building anticipation to eat your finished product. Enjoy saucy masterworks with this Groupon. $95 for Five-Hour Competition BBQ Cooking Class...

$99 for an Interior Car Detail and a SealTek Professional Paint Sealant at Hesperian 100% Hand Carwash ($199.98 Value)

Like slapping a politician across the face, writing "wash me" on the back window of a dirty car is an open invitation to duel. Avoid conflict with this Groupon. $99 for an Interior Detail and a SealTek Professional Paint Sealant ($...

One, Three, or Five Fractional Laser Skin-Resurfacing Treatments at ALC of Vallejo (Up to 69% Off)

Scars often reveal embarrassing stories, such as the time you fell off your bike or the time you tried to get back at your bike. Erase painful memories with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $249 for one fractional laser tr...

Facial with Option of Eye Treatment or $40 or $80 Worth of Sugaring Services at Gina's Skin Care (Up to 53% Off)

Running your hands over perfectly smooth, hairless legs isn't something you should only be able to do with porcelain dolls. Get pristine with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $39 for a 60-minute facial (an $80 value) $49 fo...

Eyelash Extensions with Optional Touchup, or Brow Design or Lash Tinting at Lucia's Health and Beauty (Up to 60% Off)

Eyelash extensions give eyes a glamorous look, much like wearing designer frames or contact lenses made of mink fur. Get a stylish look with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $99 for NovaLash eyelash extensions (a $250 valu...

Three Works Car Washes or One Exterior Detail Package with Carpet Shampoo at Harv's Car Wash (Up to 58% Off)

A car with a muddy exterior tells passengers of rugged off-roading sessions, whereas a car with a muddy interior tells passengers of carpoolings with Swamp Thing. Pick your passengers wisely with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Op...

$35 for a Spa Mani-Pedi with Complimentary Hot-Stone Massage and Paraffin Dip at A Froma Nail Spa ($70 Value)

Manicures keep nails from growing long, collecting dirt, and developing aspirations to be in the Guinness Book of World Records. Keep nails humble with this Groupon. $35 for a Spa Mani-Pedi with Complimentary Hot-Stone Massage and ...

$15 for Three Groupons, Each Good for $10 Worth of Sandwiches, Salads, and Healthy Cuisine for Two at Beautifull

Making a sandwich requires only two slices of bread, filling, and an expensive machine that holds the slices of bread steady while the filling is shot in between them with some sort of air-powered hose. Go somewhere that has that ap...

Cheese Lover's, Oyster Lover's, or Wine & Cheese Tours for One or Two from West Marin Food & Farm Tours (Up to 51% Off)

Studying wine grapes in their natural habitat is much more enjoyable than exploring the dank, melancholy caverns of root beer's namesake. Stroll through bliss with this Groupon. Choose from Six Options $76 for a Cheese Lover's to...

$39 for 10 Drop-In Yoga Classes at Left Coast Power Yoga ($120 Value)

Toning your body takes conscious effort, just like remembering to blink frequently enough to keep other people from getting suspicious. Fit in with this Groupon. $39 for 10 Drop-In Yoga Classes ($120 Value) Held in a room heated t...

Three- or Five-Month CrossFit Gym Membership at Lamorinda CrossFit (Up to 80% Off)

Sweating is always a good sign because it’s proof that your pores aren’t too proud to cry. Work it out with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $99 for a three-month membership ($470.25 value) $159 for a five-month membe...

$15 for a 45-Minute Chocolate-Tasting Tour for Two at Alegio Chocolate ($30 Value)

A good chocolate is as indulgent as a house where the beds are all hot tubs and the couches are all beds. Treat yourself to this Groupon. $15 for a Chocolate-Tasting Tour for Two ($30 Value) During each 45-minute tour, guides desc...

$60 for an Airsoft Shooting Range Session at International Spy Shop ($189.96 Value)

Secret agents must constantly train to maintain their extreme accuracy, keep a cool head in harrowing situations, and remember to introduce themselves last name first. Prepare yourself with this Groupon. $60 for an Airsoft Shooting...

Swedish Massage, Signature Facial, and Hydrotherapy Session for One or Two at Water Lounge Spa (Up to 56% Off)

Spa treatments can help you look like your old self, much like squeezing into your childhood overalls and showing up on your old kindergarten teacher's doorstep asking for juice. Recapture youth with this Groupon. Choose Between Tw...

$49 for Dental Exam, X-rays, and Cleaning at Gorgeous Smile Dental ($379 Value)

Dental floss removes pieces of food stuck between teeth and can also be used to make cool bracelets that still smell like your teeth. Get squeaky clean with this Groupon. $49 for Dental Checkup with Exam, X-rays, and Cleaning ($379...

One or Three Massages with Chiropractic Exam at Smith Chiropractic (Up to 93% Off)

Muscles, like holiday lights, can easily get in knots but garner lots of attention when displayed at parties. Put a twinkle in their eye with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for a chiropractic package (up to a $410 to...

$69 for a Spa Package with a Body Scrub, Facial, and Eye-and-Lip Treatment at La Pelle Skin Spa & Boutique ($150 Value)

Spas make people feel like royalty without the hassle of shopping for scepters or posing for playing-card portraits. Enjoy regal treatments with this Groupon. $69 for a Body Scrub, Facial, and Eye-and-Lip Treatment ($150 Value) Th...

One or Three Brazilian Waxes at Mind Of Beauty Day Spa (Up to 57% Off)

The less hair, the more aerodynamic a body is, as evidenced by how fast dolphins swim and how much faster furless bowling balls roll. Pick up speed with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for one Brazilian wax (up to a ...

$30 for All-Day Paintballing and Equipment Rental for Six from Paintball Tickets (Up to $240 Value)

Paintball hurts less than you think it will, like getting your first haircut or admitting that you don't love Denise. Be brave with this Groupon. $30 for a Paintball Package with Rental Equipment (Up to $240 Total Value) Six all-...

Buff/Polish Detail and One Deluxe Hand Car Wash or Headlight Restoration at Mill Valley Car Wash (55% Off)

A well-cleaned car makes road trips more enjoyable, much like installing a GPS or burning a mix CD of your favorite screams. Make a clean getaway with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $45 for one deluxe hand car wash with...

5 or 10 Yoga, Pilates Fusion, and Zumba Classes at Glow Yoga & Wellness (Up to 67% Off)

Group exercise classes are both fun and good for your body, like bench-pressing a birthday clown. Get the best of both worlds with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for five yoga, Pilates Fusion, and Zumba classes ($80...

$20 for $40 Worth of Contemporary Vietnamese Cuisine for Dinner at Three Seasons

It's always inadvisable to bite the hand that feeds you, especially since it's usually your own hand and the food is on the fork part anyway. Sink your teeth into this Groupon. $20 for $40 Worth of Contemporary Vietnamese Cuisine ...

$20 for 30 Classes from MetaBody Yoga & Fitness Pass ($350 Value)

Like tug-of-war tournaments and harmonized singing telegrams, workouts are more effective when done with a group. Join a fitness community with this Groupon. $20 for 30 Yoga and Fitness Classes ($350 Value) This Groupon is valid a...

10 or 20 $5 Vouchers for Pizzeria Cuisine at Milan Pizza (Up to a 51% Off)

A pizza is always a welcome sight, even if its pepperonis are arranged in the shape of a scowl. Dig into a truly happy meal with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $25 for 10 $5 gift cards for pizzeria cuisine, to be used o...

$82 for an Initial Allergy Assessment and Treatment of One Allergen Family at Advanced Allergy Solutions ($165 Value)

People with allergies often have to miss out on activities they enjoy, such as camping, gardening, or attending the cat ballet. Scratch out sickly symptoms with this Groupon. $82 for Initial Allergy Assessment and Treatment of One ...

20 or 35 Classes at Bikram Hot Yoga Daly City (Up to 90% Off)

Adopting exercises from other cultures can help shake up a workout, which explains the growing popularity of that sport in which Scottish guys throw logs. Speak the universal language—sweating—with this Groupon. Choose Between ...

$129 for an In-Office Zoom! Teeth-Whitening Treatment at Concord Dental Arts ($750 Value)

A focused beam of light can do many things, from whitening teeth to murdering a terrifying shadow puppet. Brighten up with this Groupon. $129 for a Zoom! Teeth-Whitening Treatment ($750 Value) In-office Zoom! teeth whitening can w...

45-Minute Simulated Auto Race for One, Two, or Four at iRaceCenter (Up to 61% Off)

Racing simulators recreate all the sensory details of the sport, from the steering wheel's rattle during hard turns to the GPS system's terrified shrieks. Feel the simulated g-force with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $1...

$189 for a Tail-Wheel Aircraft Ride-Along Flight from San Carlos Flight Center ($380 Value)

There are few things as liberating as being able to fly, which is why humans invented airplanes and why penguins constantly try to sabotage them by climbing into their jet engines. Feel the freedom of the skies with this Groupon. $...

Signature Facial with Peel or Brazilian Wax at Skincare by Erika (Up to 65% Off)

Getting a facial can take 10 years off your face, just as marrying the district attorney can take 10 years off your sentence. Shave off some time this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for a one-hour signature facial with a ...

Two or Four Private Dance Lessons for One or Two People at Escuela de Tango (Up to 74% Off)

To make dance routines flashier, professionals often wear sequined outfits or burlap sacks filled with fireworks. Light up the dance floor with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for two private, 60-minute dance lessons...

Wineluv Wednesday: Admission to Wine Tasting at Wineluv Wednesdays at Blu

A glass of wine is like a theater kick line: Strong legs leave a lasting impression. Get your midweek plans all in a row with this offer: For $15 ($30 value), you'll enjoy admission to an upcoming Wineluv Wednesday at Blu Restaurant...

$19 for an Outdoor Photo Shoot with Prints and E-view CD from Portrait Scene ($218 Value)

Photographs make it easy to remember what your loved ones look like and save you the trouble of painting them each night while they sleep. Get some much-needed rest with this Groupon. $19 for an Outdoor Photo-Shoot Package ($218 T...

20 or 40 Units of Botox, or 50 Units of Dysport at Aura Skin Spa (Up to 56% Off)

Your face has a nose for smelling, eyes for seeing, and a mouth for keeping all your saliva handy. Resurface your face with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $169 for 20 units of Botox or 50 units of Dysport (a $350 value)...

$120 for a 10-Round Play Card at Pruneridge Golf Club in Santa Clara (Up to $220 Value)

Like the ability to throw knives at apples balanced atop human heads, golf skills disappear if you don't keep working at them. Learn from your mistakes with this Groupon. $120 for 10 9-Hole Rounds of Golf (Up to $220 Value) Groupo...

One, Three, or Five Microdermabrasion Treatments at Essential Skin Care by Linda (Up to 54% Off)

A face is often the first thing you notice about other people, unless their palms have little mouths. Get a new look with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $49 for one microdermabrasion treatment (a $100 value) $139 for thr...

$14 for a Large Specialty or Five-Topping Pizza, 2-Liter Soda, and Ice Cream at Papa John's Pizza (Up to $29.47 Value)

Like the sun, a pizza is round, supports life, and will eventually be destroyed by hungry astronauts. Grab a life-giving slice with this Groupon. $14 for a Pizza Package (Up to $29.47 Total Value) One large specialty pizza or a c...

$25 for $50 Worth of Bicycles, Gear, Rentals, and Tune-Ups at Summit Bicycles

Bike shops fix everything from rusty bike chains to frames bent by the hooves of vengeful, unemployed horses. Spruce up your mechanical steed with this Groupon. $25 for $50 Worth of Bicycles, Gear, Rentals, and Tune-Ups Cyclists g...

Facial for Mom, Signature Facial, or Three Signature Facials at Veronika Michaels Skin Studio (Up to 61% Off)

Poets call the eyes the windows to the soul, just as they call the face the weird rubbery house of the soul. Smooth your siding with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $59 for one 60-minute Facial for Mom (a $150 value) $79 ...

$22 for a Rock Star or Hollywood Toes Glittery Gel Treatment at Nails by Rubie ($45 Value)

Nails, like mirrors or a spy who’s being interrogated by his wife regarding who left the toilet seat up, sometimes crack. Defend your digits with this Groupon. $22 for One Rock Star or Hollywood Toes Treatment ($45 Value) The Ro...

Three or Six $10 Vouchers for Mexican Food at Taqueria Vallarta (Up to 52% Off)

Doctors recommend eating fish regularly and mouth kissing one at least once per lifetime. Say "Oh-mega!" with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for three $10 vouchers (a $30 total value) $29 for six $10 vouchers (a $60...

$69 for One 75-Minute Rolfing Session at Mountain Rolfing ($140 Value)

Everybody unwinds from a stressful day differently: some people get a rolfing treatment, whereas others watch flames engulf a big pile of tires. Let tension melt away with this Groupon. $69 for One 75-Minute Rolfing Session ($140 V...

Three or Six Needleless Collagen Treatments at Rejuvenate You (Up to 53% Off)

Choose Between Two Options $159 for three needleless collagen treatments (a $335 value) $299 for six needleless collagen treatments (a $629 value) The first visit, lasting an hour-and-a-half, involves a consultation, skin analys...

$199 for a Full-Day Custom Sailing Trip for Two to Angel Island from Imagine Sailing Tours ($400 Value)

Sailors learn to be experts at knot tying, from securing the vessel with a tight anchor hitch to securing the captain after he succumbs to madness and tries to eat his own hook hand. This Groupon is a mutinous bounty. $199 for a Fu...

$129 for an Exam, Cleaning, X-rays, and Zoom Teeth Whitening at Opera Plaza Dentistry ($553 Value)

A white smile improves your appearance by blinding others to your second head and compound eyes. Give ’em the ol’ razzle-dazzle with this Groupon. $129 for a Teeth-Whitening Package ($553 Total Value) Dental exam, x-rays, and...

$15 for $30 Worth of Japanese Food at Jojo Restaurant & Sushi Bar

If humans are mostly made of water, and fish traditionally inhabit water, fish should naturally occur in the human body. Fix this gap in nature’s logic with this Groupon. $15 for $30 Worth of Japanese Food The vegetarian Paradis...

$25 for Five Premium Exterior Car Washes at Millbrae Carwash ($50 Value)

Some people treat their car like it's their best friend by giving it a nickname or a sponge bath. Clean your companion with this Groupon. $25 for Five Premium Exterior Car Washes ($50 Value) Rainbow wax Wheel cleaning Air freshener

Photofacial with Optional ClearScan Facial-Vein Therapy at trioSkincare (65% Off)

True happiness comes from finding beauty everywhere you look, especially in mirrors. Like what you see with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $225 for a photofacial with ClearScan facial-vein therapy (a $650 value) $139 fo...

Historic Angel Island Tram Tour for Two, Four, or Six from Angel Island Company (Half Off)

The government designated the first national parks to protect natural wonders, which were threatened by Teddy Roosevelt's insatiable appetite for peppered bark. Experience earth's gorgeously guarded barkscape with this Groupon. Cho...

One, Two, or Three Brazilian Waxes at Orchids Beauty Salon (Up to 58% Off)

Without wax, candles would just be limp strings and important documents would be sealed with kisses. Put wax to work with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $22 for one Brazilian wax (a $45 value) $40 for two Brazilian waxes...

Haircut, Shampoo, and Blow-Dry with a Junior, Senior, or Master Stylist at Topps Salon Day Spa (Up to 55% Off)

A haircut is a cheaper way to redefine your image than getting back from India and never shutting up about it. Change things up with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for a haircut, shampoo and blow-dry with a junior st...

Historical Walking Tour for Two or Four from Emperor Norton's Fantastic San Francisco Time Machine (Up to 64% Off)

A guided tour is one of the best ways to acquaint yourself with a city, second only to proclaiming yourself its king and observing the types of local produce that get thrown at you. Discover the local flavor with this Groupon. Choo...

$45 for One Unlimited Month of Fitness Boot Camp at LiveFit Boot Camp (Up to $279 Value)

Exercising with friends allows you to morally support each other, and, when the time comes, to have the collective muscle to beat up an asteroid headed for Earth. Get strength in numbers with this Groupon. $45 for One Month of Unli...

Bartending and Mixology Classes at ABC Bartending School (Up to 70% Off). Three Options Available.

Though it's a good way to connect with others and a fundamental part of living near train tracks, pouring one’s heart out to strangers is an unsustainable career. Learn a more employable pour with this Groupon. Choose from Three ...

$20 for $40 Worth of Clothing and Accessories at Taylrz Joynt

They say you should dress for the job you want instead of the one you have, which is why most people show up for work dressed as retired. Dress for success with this Groupon. $20 for $40 worth of Clothing and Accessories Customers...

Vietnamese Dinner for Two or Four at Pho Huong Nam (Up to 52% Off)

Most countries base their cuisine off nearby ingredients, or in Candy Land’s case, a law that deems salads unconstitutional. Sample the fruits of a faraway land with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for $30 worth of...

$49 for a 60-Minute Deep-Tissue Massage at Bay Bodywork ($105 Value)

Overly tense muscles can cause nagging pain, yet too-loose muscles will flap behind you like streamers when you’re roller-skating. Make sure your muscles are just right with this Groupon. $49 for a 60-Minute Deep-Tissue Massage (...

$25 for $50 Worth of Ethiopian Food and Drinks for Two at Sheba Dining in Oakland

Taking loved ones on dinner dates makes them feel special, much like hiring a loud person to shout their name on the sidewalk. Make your sweetheart swoon with this Groupon. $25 for $50 Worth of Ethiopian Food and Drinks for Two Th...

$75 for San Francisco Bay Cruise with Winery Stops from SF Winery Cruise ($165 Value)

Like Mike Tyson, wine is usually robust, is often boxed, and should never influence tattooing decisions. Imbibe the spirit of a champion with this Groupon. $75 for San Francisco Bay Cruise with Winery Stops ($165 Value) The four-h...

Two Conventional or Synthetic Oil Changes with Tire Rotations and Inspections at Midas San Rafael (Up to 76% Off)

Cars are cool because they are essentially big, strong robots that you can get inside and control. The world is better than you thought with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $40 for two conventional oil changes (a $169.94 ...

$52 for a Signature Mani-Pedi at Thi Spa & Nails ($105 Value)

Rough-looking hands and feet often get blamed for crimes they didn't commit, such as cookie-jar thefts, slap attacks, and crab walking on museum ceilings. Defend wrongfully accused palms and soles with this Groupon. $52 for a Signa...

Haircut with Option for Color and/or Highlights from Skye Disney at Phoenix Rising Salon & Day Spa (Up to 62% Off)

Hair never stops growing, much like America's endless, beautiful forests. Trim your ends with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $29 for a haircut and style (a $70 value) $59 for a haircut, style, and base color or partial h...

Eclectic 10-Course Tasting Menu for Two or Four at Roxy’s Cafe (Half Off)

Some things are best in small doses, like bad news or the topical cream Sylvester Stallone uses to keep his skin looking wet. Get a perfect portion with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $75 for a 10-course tasting menu fo...

Microdermabrasion with Add-Ons at Angela’s European Skin Care (Up to 61% Off). Three Options Available.

Nine out of 10 scientists agree that a healthy human face needs oxygen, after studying the effects of encasing the 10th scientist's head in a cube of cement. Free your face with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $55 for one...

Mediterranean Food for Two or Four (Up to 52% Off) at Goood Frikin Chicken

Professional chefs generally know more than the average cook, including how to remove the poisonous glands from onions. Dine out with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for $30 worth of Mediterranean food for two, plus ...

$15 for Six $5 Vouchers for Locally Roasted Coffee at Bay Coffee Company ($30 Total Value)

Some people can't start the day without a hot cup of coffee and a shower to wash off the remnants of their sleep cocoon. Stir up your morning routine with this Groupon. $15 for Six $5 Vouchers for Locally Roasted Coffee ($30 Total ...

60-Minute Aveda Massage, Facial, or Both with Steam-Room and Sauna Access at Rêve SpaSalon in San Mateo (Up to 52% Off)

Before battle, samurai warriors gently exfoliated and deeply cleansed their pores so they could slay foes with one sexy glance. Become an aesthetic warrior with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $59 for a 60-minute Aveda E...

Haircut and Conditioning Treatment with Optional Partial Highlights from Carolynn Taymuree at La Perle (Up to 64% Off)

A barber uses many tools: shears for cutting, brooms for sweeping, and Barbicide for killing Barbas, demon of fear. Leave it to a professional with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for a haircut, blow-dry, and deep-c...

One or Three Acupuncture Sessions and Herbal Consultations at Lake Merritt Community Acupuncture (Up to 80% Off)

A healthy body requires occasional supplements, either from taking herbal remedies or willing yourself to grow a third little baby lung. Give your body a bonus with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $18 for one private one...

One or Two Dental Exams with X-rays, Cleaning, and Fluoride Treatment at Bayside Dental (Up to 87% Off)

A white smile improves your appearance by blinding others to your second head and compound eyes. Give 'em the ol' razzle-dazzle with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for one dental exam with x-rays, cleaning, and fluo...

One or Three Microdermabrasion Treatments from Ashley Marie Skin Care at pHyxx Salon (Up to 57% Off)

Getting a microdermabrasion is an easier way to resurface your face than smearing it with sardines and letting a cat lick them off. Give your face the treatment it deserves with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for on...

$45 for Five Visits for Up to Three People to Habitot Children's Museum in Berkeley ($90 Value)

Like universities, children's museums provide young people a place to study nature, an outlet to explore their creativity, and an excuse not to have a real job. Procrastinate constructively with today's Groupon. $45 for a Visit Pas...

Comfort Food Dinner with Appetizers and Dessert for Two or Four at J Tu Cafe & Restaurant (Up to 56% Off)

Going to a restaurant with a fancy menu is a great way to impress a date, who might not otherwise know you can read. Order for the table with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $24 for dinner for two (up to a $49.45 total va...

One or Two Microdermabrasion Treatments at Rejuvalon Skin Care (Up to 53% Off)

Taking care of your skin can make you look like a movie star, much like standing in front of a green wall and screaming in terror at an alien that no one can see. Get ready for your close-up with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Op...

Exam with 60-Minute Massage and X-rays with Option for Two or Four Adjustments at Barton Chiropractic (Up to 88% Off)

Like the hand inside a sock puppet, the spine supports the body's every motion and keeps it from collapsing into a formless sack. Shape up with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for a chiropractic package (up to a $320 t...

$99 for a Spa Mani-Pedi and Choice of Massage at Cocoon Urban Day Spa (Up to $202 Value)

Spending a day at a spa is a tranquil experience surpassed only by swimming in a pool filled with mashed potatoes or having a hand model slap you to sleep. Feel the softer side with this Groupon. $99 for a Spa Mani-Pedi and Choice ...

$12 for $24 Worth of Sushi and Japanese Food or Tea and Coffee at Shabu Sushi & Little Sweet Cafe

For years, European merchants searched for a direct route to Asia, eventually burrowing through the earth and accidentally rediscovering Luxembourg. Quell your own inner rumblings with this Groupon. $12 for $24 Worth of Sushi and J...

Spa Package with Paraffin Treatment at A Petite Retreat (58% Off). Two Options Available.

Getting a spa treatment is a great way to reward yourself, much like presenting yourself with a check for $1,000 worth of self-hugs (one). Thank you with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $89 for a spa package (up to a $210...

Mediterranean Fusion Cuisine at Mezzé (Half Off). Two Options Available.

Organic vegetables are grown without the use of pesticides, as they naturally repel pests by threatening to spoil popular TV dramas that the bugs haven't caught up on. Show good taste with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options ...

Three-Course Italian Lunch or Dinner for Two, Four, or Six at Michelangelo Ristorante & Caffe (Up to 55% Off)

The colorful sauces and slurpable noodles of Italian cuisine make it fun for everyone, except for newly reformed scoundrels attempting to pass for civilized gentlemen. Take a break from manners with this Groupon. Choose from Three ...

$999 for a Laser Gum Treatment for the Entire Mouth at Respect Your Mouth ($2,500 Value)

Aching gums can trigger outbursts of public profanity, forced smiles, and the worst crime of all—not enjoying homemade pie. Repair sore feelings with this Groupon. $999 for a Laser Gum Treatment for the Entire Mouth ($2,500 Value...

Dog Grooming, Overnight Boarding, Doggy Daycare, or Indoor Dog-Park Play at Barka Lounge (Up to 64% Off)

Pets are members of the family, specifically smaller members who can't voice their complaints about being photographed in a basket. Earn back their respect with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $20 for a basic spa package f...

$25 for 10 Classes at Bikram Yoga College of India (Up to $100 Value)

Like running on a treadmill or sitting still on a couch in the desert, Bikram yoga will make you sweat. Get it all out with this Groupon. $25 for 10 Yoga Classes (Up to $100 Value) The 10-class punch card grants the holder access ...

$129 for a Zoom Teeth-Whitening Treatment from Cliff Broschinsky, D.D.S. in San Ramon ($600 Value)

Teeth are more than just precious rocks that fall out of skulls so that they can be turned into jewelry. Keep your headstones polished with this Groupon. $129 for a Zoom Teeth-Whitening Treatment ($600 Value) Following an initial ...

Full Set of Natural or VaVoom Eyelash Extensions at Milvali Salon & Cosmetics (Up to 66% Off)

Lengthening your eyelashes can make you look like a movie star, much like standing in front of a green wall and screaming in terror at an alien that no one can see. Get ready for your close-up with this Groupon. Choose Between Two ...

Three Nights of Camping at Trinity or Shasta Lake with Boat-Launch Pass from Shasta Recreation Company (Up to 60% Off)

Camping brings man closer to nature and nature closer to a boom box. Introduce Mother Nature to Papa Roach with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $26 for a three-night camping package at Trinity Lake (a $61 total value) T...

$40 for $100 Worth of Custom Framing Services at Underglass Framing

Great art inspires overwhelming emotion, which is why it needs to be protected from the tears of bawling onlookers. Encase your art in a worthy frame with this Groupon. $40 for $100 Worth of Custom Framing Services Underglass Fram...

$40 for $100 Worth of Complete Custom Framing or Custom Mirrors at Woodside Gallery

An abundance of wall-hung paintings and photographs can protect you when Dracula claws through the drywall because your blood smells like monster candy. Obstacle up with this Groupon. $40 for $100 Worth of Complete Custom Framing o...

One or Three 90-Minute Microdermabrasion Treatments at Beauty Unlimited (Up to 57% Off)

Your face has a nose for smelling, eyes for seeing, and a mouth for keeping all your saliva handy. Resurface your face with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $59 for one microdermabrasion treatment for the face (a $130 val...

Italian Dinner or Sunday Brunch for Two, Four, or Six at Villa d' Este (Up to 52% Off)

The best sauces, like the best imaginary friends, are rich and from the Mediterranean. Dine alone or with Esmeralda the railroad tycoon with this Groupon. Choose from Six Options $26 for an Italian dinner for two (up to a $52 valu...

One or Three Blowouts or a One-Year VIP Membership for Blowouts and More at Blowout Bar Salon (Up to 54% Off)

Hair is constantly growing, just like weeds and the Washington Monument. Smooth things over with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $25 for one blowout (a $50 value) $69 for three blowouts (a $150 value) $239 for a one-year...

One or Three 75-Minute Custom-Blend Facials at Forever Radiant (Up to 61% Off)

Your face says a lot about you, from how well you take care of your skin to whether you can moisten your eyeballs with your tongue. Don't blink and miss this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for one 75-minute custom-blen...

Segway Tour for One, Two, or Four from Segway of Oakland (Up to 67% Off)

A segway lets its rider roam sidewalks without walking, much like a regal sedan chair or an enchanted wheelbarrow. Travel feet-free with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $25 for a Segway tour for one (a $65 value) $45 for ...

French and Creole Food at Brunch or Dinner at Balançoire (Up to 52% Off). Four Options Available.

The French have given the United States many tremendous gifts, such as the Statue of Liberty and the current Statue of Liberty, which subdued the first one after lightning made it evil. Befriend an entire nation with this Groupon. ...

Four or Eight Lipotropic Injections with B6 and B12 at Elite MedSpa (Up to 83% Off)

The secret to living a long life lies in maintaining a healthy diet, regularly relaxing, and never, ever dying. Stay serene and immortal with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $79 for four lipotropic injections with B6 and...

Farm Day Passes for Two Children and Two Adults, or $50 for $100 Toward a Children’s Party at Lemos Farm

Old MacDonald's nursery rhyme paints a delightful picture of farm life for children and teaches parents a textbook way to incorporate melody into itemized deductions. Experience farm fun for all ages with this Groupon. Choose Betwe...

Contemporary Latin American Dinner for Two or Four with Margaritas and Botanas at Agave Grill & Cantina (Up to 60% Off)

The tortilla's thinness makes it ideal for folding, sliding under closed doors, and illustrating theories that the earth is made of corn. Exhibit A, with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for a Latin American dinner fo...

Six Laser Hair-Removal Treatments on a Small, Medium, Large, or Extra-Large Area at Manasra Medical Spa (Up to 80% Off)

If comic books have taught us anything, it's that getting zapped with mysterious rays always gives you crime-fighting abilities—in this case, superhuman smoothness. Save the world with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $13...

$10 for $25 Worth of Indian Cuisine and Drinks at Kennedy’s Irish Pub & Indian Curry House

India and Ireland worked hard to throw off the yoke of British imperial control and the even more oppressive yolks of the Cadbury Creme Eggs that were a mandated part of every imperialist meal. Celebrate culinary independence with t...

One-Month Gym Membership with Personal Training, or Two-Month Membership at Meridian's Bodies in Motion (Up to 82% Off)

Since the rise of the Internet, people have struggled to tear their now-useless phone books in half. Bulk up to succeed where others have failed with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $59 for a one-month gym membership wit...

One, Three, or Five Microdermabrasion Treatments at Lan's Skin Care (Up to 59% Off)

Getting a facial is the most caring thing you can do for your face aside from pressing it deeply into the hands of a kindly old man. Refresh your face with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $49 for one microdermabrasion tre...

Shampoo, Haircut, and Style with Option for a Hydration Treatment and Glazing at Orchid Salon (Up to 65% Off)

Haircuts often flatter your face’s shape, with bangs accentuating heart-shaped cheekbones and layers hiding the fact that your head is actually a giant octagon. Make your haircut work for you with this Groupon. Choose Between Tw...

American Bistro Brunch for Two or Four with Unlimited Mimosas at Cafe Biere (Half Off)

Unlike robotic parents, toast and eggs are a natural pair. Initiate hunger protocol with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $34 for brunch for two with two entrees and bottomless mimosas (a $68 value) $68 for brunch for fou...

$30 for $65 Worth of Video and Mixed-Media Transfer Services at Audio Video Workshop in Redwood City

Transferring old videotapes to DVD frees up space, letting shelves welcome back books and VCRs finally apply for jobs as grilled-cheese makers. Make way with this Groupon. $30 for $65 Worth of Video and Mixed-Media Transfer Service...

$32 for a Hand Car Wash and Wax at Precision Body Shop & Detail ($64.95 Value)

A car wash can transform your vehicle, which is useful for impressing a date or convincing the police it was a much dirtier car that drove through that science museum. Make a clean getaway with this Groupon. $32 for a Hand Car Wash...

$59 for a 10.5-Mile South-Fork Rafting Trip from Sierra Whitewater (Up to $120 Value)

Before man conquered his fear of water, he amused himself with dust sports such as pushing boulders off cliffs, wrestling tumbleweeds, and falling in the dust. Rinse yourself off with this Groupon. $59 for a 10.5-Mile South-Fork Ra...

Children's Swimming Lessons and a One-Month Family Pass or Swim Team Membership at AquaTech Swim School (Up to 56% Off)

Learning to swim is an essential safety skill, as most bike helmets are harvested from the middle of the ocean. Dive into knowledge with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for four 30-minute children's group swimming le...

90-Minute Spa Packages with Facials, Massages, and Body Scrubs for One or Two at Leisure Health Spa (Up to 59% Off)

People like feeling good, which is why they get massages or wear nice, loose pants. Loosen up with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $79 for a spa package for one person (a $180 total value) 30-minute anti-aging facial wi...

Mediterranean Cuisine at Arabian Nights Restaurant (Up to 52% Off). Two Options Available.

The most reliable way to cook pita bread is to bake it over an open flame, narrowly edging out laying it on top of an overheated laptop computer. Enjoy time-tested culinary tradition with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options ...

$40 for $100 Worth of Video-Transfer Services at AMR Productions in Novato

Video footage preserves family moments that might otherwise be forgotten, like the day Grandpa wiped everyone's memory with a spy drug. Bring precious records to the digital age with this Groupon. $40 for $100 Worth of Video-Transf...

One or Three Vi Peels with Half Off IsisMD Products or $20 for $40 Worth of Body Products at Isis Skin & Body

Your face is the first thing people notice about you and the first thing they'll describe to the police after you open all their mail. Make a lasting impression with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $169 for a Vi peel and ...

Restylane or Dysport Injection at Looking Glass Plastic Surgery and Consultation (Up to 79% Off). Six Options Available.

Sagging skin makes you look older, which is why it's so coveted by teenagers. Look youthful with this Groupon. Choose from Six Options $199 for a consultation and up to .5 cc of Restylane (up to a $600 value) $275 for a consultat...

One or Two Massages with Optional Manipulative Adjustments at Morello Family Chiropractic (Up to 76% Off)

The human skeleton gives the body structure, preventing us from looking like sacks filled with creamed corn. Stand up for yourself with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for one 60-minute massage (a $60 value) with an ...

Full Set of Faux-Mink Lash Extensions and Optional Touchup from Kristi Clifford at Indulge Salon (Up to 67% Off)

Humans use eyelashes like cats use whiskers—for looking adorable and rubbing against strangers' legs. Look pretty with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $99 for one full set of faux-mink eyelash extensions (up to a $300 ...

5 or 10 Group Fitness Classes at MindBody Connection (Up to 55% Off)

Like the framework of a mighty skyscraper, the core helps humans hold up the weight of the sky. Stay firm against the firmament with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for 5 group fitness classes (a $75 value) $59 for 1...

$40 for a Two-Hour Sunset, Full-Moon, or Afternoon Cruise for Two from Bay Breeze Charters in Sausalito ($80 Value)

Like dandelion fluffies and shampoo commercials, sailboats harness the power of wind. Put breezes to work with this Groupon. $40 for a Two-Hour Sunset, Full-Moon, or Afternoon Cruise for Two (an $80 value) Cruises send sightseers ...

Sushi and Japanese Food for Two or Four at Hop On Sushi (Half Off)

A well-rolled piece of sushi won't fall apart when you try to pick it up, unlike the pile of leaves you briefly thought was a baby. Keep it together with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for $30 worth of sushi and Jap...

$10 for $20 Worth of Burgers, Fried Chicken, and Sandwiches at My HomeStyle Cafe

Good Southern cooking can transport you to a country kitchen—biscuits in the oven, chicken frying in the skillet, and a bare-chested Ted Turner in the doorway with an armload of firewood. Experience true grits with this Groupon. ...

6 or 12 Kids' Open-Play Sessions at Pump It Up (Up to 58% Off)

The pillowy nature of a bounce castle reminds kids that they are in a safe place and not in an actual castle, where they'd likely be traded for bread. Have feudal fun with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $20 for 6 open-p...

Dental Exam and X-rays with Teeth-Whitening Treatment or Regular Cleaning at Willow Family Dental (Up to 91% Off)

Yellow teeth indicate bad habits such as smoking cigarettes, drinking coffee, or swishing with butter. White out bad hygienic choices with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $99 for a comprehensive exam, x-rays, and an in-o...

$12 for $25 Worth of Vegan Soul Food at Souley Vegan

A vegan diet requires people to get a complete day's worth of nutrition without eating animals, animal byproducts, or plastic animal figurines. Simplify your sustenance with this Groupon. $12 for $25 Worth of Vegan Soul Food Diner...

Pizza Meal with Appetizer and Soda or $12 for $25 Worth of Pizzeria Cuisine at Pasquale's West Coast Pizzeria

People love pizza because its circular shape satisfies every human's primal urge to devour the planet Earth. Dig into the crust with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for a pizza meal (up to a $31.97 total value) One ...

Two Classes or Private Yoga Hike for Up to 15 People from Hiking Yoga (Up to 53% Off)

Yoga awakens the body and spirit, allowing yogis to forecast weather, traffic patterns, and unwinning lottery numbers, such as "four" and "peanut." Tune and tone your body with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $19 for two...

Four Laser Hair-Removal Treatments on a Small or Medium Area from Alfred L. Caruso MD (Up to 64% Off)

Clearing your body of unwanted hair makes your skin smooth enough to convince blind people they're holding a huge baby. Be a big softy with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $149 for four laser hair-removal treatments on a...

Lunch for Two or Four or Dinner on Sunday–Thursday for Two or Four at Sanctuary Ultra Lounge (Up to 52% Off)

Taking loved ones on dinner dates makes them feel special, much like hiring a loud person to shout their name on the sidewalk. Make your sweetheart swoon with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $15 for $30 worth of lunch for ...

Haircut Package with Deep-Conditioning Treatment and Optional Color or Full Highlights at About Beauty (Up to 68% Off)

Haircuts freshen looks by trimming away split ends or create drama by pruning hair into a topiary soaring falcon. Make the cut with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $34.99 for a haircut package, which includes a shampoo, a...

$129 for In-Office LED Teeth Whitening at Diente Dental (Up to $350 Value)

A glowing smile charms irritable librarians, stern highway-patrol officers, and reactionary judges with their big, fancy ideas about driving through the library. Rev up your smile with this Groupon. $129 for In-Office LED Teeth Whi...

$15 for Two Large Cheese or One-Topping Pizzas at New York Pasta & Pizza ($30.98 Value)

A pizza can host any combination of toppings, from pepperoni and sausage to pineapple and a big, floppy steak. Personalize your pie with this Groupon. $15 for Two Large Cheese or One-Topping Pizzas ($30.98 Value) Customers can cho...

60- or 90-Minute Massage, or 90-Minute Couples Massage at Shape Shifters Pilates and Health Studio (Up to 57% Off)

Relaxation is one of the fundamental tenets of health, alongside flexibility and never eating thumbtacks unless they are safely encased in wax. Sharpen your physique with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for a 60-minut...

$39 for a One-Month Gym Membership and One Personal-Training Session at Fitness SF ($199 Value)

It's important to stay healthy so that you can live long enough to see the next generation of cola lovers. Never go flat with this Groupon. $39 for a One-Month Gym Membership and One Personal-Training Session ($199 Value) Membersh...

One or Two 1-Hour Acupuncture Treatments with Consultation at Diana Shkolnik Acupuncture (Up to 59% Off)

Acupuncture is effective for relieving stress, as demonstrated by the fact that even voodoo dolls use it to recover after a hard day of work. Cure what ails you with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for a one-hour 60 ...

Haircut with Blow-Dry, Partial Highlights or Color, or Full Highlights at Natural Look Salon & Spa (Up to 61% Off)

Without hair to protect them, scalps burn in the summer, freeze in the winter, and bear little to no fruit in the spring. Lavish love on your locks with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $29 for a haircut, style, and blow-d...

One of Four Walking Tours for One, Two, or Four People from Roam Local (Up to 55% Off)

Even though it'd be nice to find a man who is willing to push you around in a stroller for little to no money, you can get around a city simply by walking. Get out there with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $19 for a walk...

One or Three Collagen Facials with Dermafile from Stacey Witt Skin Care at About Face (Up to 60% Off)

Becoming an adult means developing a few wrinkles, much like becoming a teenager means driving across the country to meet the scientists that grew you. Escape the inevitable with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for o...

Bike Rental and Tours for Two or Four from Bay City Bike (Half Off)

Riding a bike is an easy way to minimize your carbon footprint, like reusing plastic bags as wedding gifts. Make the world a better place with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $35 for a self-guided bike tour for two (a $70 ...

10 or 20 Classes or Six Months of Unlimited Classes at Bikram Yoga San Jose (Up to 78% Off)

Adopting exercises from other cultures can help shake up a workout, which explains the growing popularity of that sport in which Scottish guys throw logs. Speak the universal language—sweating—with this Groupon. Choose from Thr...

Italian Lunch or Dinner at Ristorante Bella Vita in Los Altos (Half Off). Three Options Available.

Boiling noodles is a great way to make a delicious pasta dish or express disdain for a kindergartner's art project. Demonstrate fine taste with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $15 for $30 worth of Italian food for lunch $...

Haircut and Conditioning with Optional Highlights or Keratin Treatment at Beâ‹…Youâ‹…tiful Salonâ‹…Spaâ‹…Supply (Up to 55% Off)

Getting a haircut is a great way to stand out in the eyes of a special someone, especially if you do it in front of them yourself with a pair of rusty scissors. Get positive attention with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $...

60-Minute Massage or Float Session at Zazen (Up to 53% Off)

Massage tables and float tanks give you a break from day-to-day aggravations, such as the sound of all those dogs pawing and scratching your windows. Get a moment's peace with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for a 60...

Haircut or Ombre Color with Style at Salon DNA (Up to 64% Off)

Without hair, there would be nothing to conceal the secret treasure map tattooed on the back of your scalp. Keep your secret safe with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $37 for a haircut with wash and style (a $75 value) $...

5, 10, or 15 Kids' Drop-In Play Sessions at PartiPalooza (Up to 60% Off)

Inclement weather forces children to play in their homes, which is literally the last place their parents want them. Make everyone happy with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $25 for 5 kids' drop-in play sessions (a $50 va...

Jamaican Lunch with Appetizers, Entrees, and Sodas for Two or Four at Sweet Fingers (Up to 52% Off)

Dining out is one way to explore your town, along with clinging to the back of a bus and borrowing a police horse. Try something new with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $12.99 for a Jamaican lunch for two (up to a $25.98...

Northern Italian Cuisine for Two or Four at Specchio (Up to 51% Off)

Italian cuisine is often served "family style"—off a platter rotating 50 feet above the diners' heads, which they can only reach through wits and teamwork. Bond over a meal with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $25 for ...

10 Aquatic Fitness Classes for Adults or 10 Lap Swim Sessions at Burlingame Aquatic Club (Up to 55% Off)

Swimming lets humans experience the buoyancy formerly known only to bobbing apples and inflatable witches. Explore the floating frontier with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for 10 aquatic fitness classes for adults ...

$29 for an Exam, Consultation, X-rays, and 60-Minute Massage at Cantor Chiropractic Center ($385 Value)

Back pain can compel you to stay in bed all day, much like the discovery that there's still Halloween candy in your pillowcase. Face the day with this Groupon. $29 for a Chiropractic Exam, Consultation, X-rays, and 60-Minute Massag...

Three or Six Laser Hair-Removal Treatments or One Year of Unlimited Laser Hair Removal at Aura Skin Spa (Up to 75% Off)

Every wrinkle on the face tells a story, especially if it turns out to be another tiny mouth. Silence the peanut gallery with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $159 for three laser hair-removal treatments (up to a $600 valu...

VIP Seated Tasting with Tour for Two or Four at NakedWines.com Wine Studio and Tasting Lounge (Up to 75% Off)

Wine creates a rosy flush, disguising the blush that creeps up your cheeks at the sight of a handsome party clown. Avoid embarrassment with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for a VIP seated tasting for two (a $50 valu...

Himalayan Cuisine at Himalayan Flavors (Up to 53% Off). Two Options Available.

Going out to eat is more convenient than cooking, especially if all your colanders are already full of pasta you haven't gotten around to eating yet. Save all that pasta for another day with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options...

$40 for $100 Worth of Custom Framing at FastFrame

Using a gaudy frame can detract from a beautiful photo, much like when the Statue of Liberty wore bell-bottoms for the Bicentennial. Exalt your art with this Groupon. $40 for $100 Worth of Custom Framing Artisans frame mementos an...

One, Three, or Five Slim-it Far-Infrared Body Wraps at Costa Del Sol Tanning (Up to 60% Off)

Like an overstayed houseguest, body bulk can be difficult to get rid of without putting it through strenuous labor, diminishing its food supply, or poking it with a pin to test it for excess helium. Rid yourself of baggage with this...

4 or 10 Kickboxing Classes with Personal-Training Session and Boxing Gloves at iLoveKickboxing.com (Up to 74% Off)

Kickboxing is gaining popularity because of its high-energy sessions, full-body workout, and the rising threat of prizefighter-kangaroo encounters. Prepare your body for physical feats and marsupial feet with this Groupon. Choose B...

Haircut with Option for a Conditioning Treatment and Partial Highlights at Hair at the Ritz (Up to 53% Off)

A good stylist asks lots of questions, whereas a bad stylist just asks, “What?! Your hair grew back again?” before throwing out their scissors. Find someone who understands hair with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $6...

$179 for In-Office Zoom! Teeth Whitening at Sutter Dental ($599 Value)

Keeping teeth clean and white is the first and only step in coping with the fact that your skeleton is slowly escaping from your body through your mouth. Deal with it with this Groupon. $179 for In-Office Zoom! Teeth Whitening ($59...

American Comfort Food and Drinks at Butter (52% Off). Two Options Available.

Eating comfort food reminds you of the way your parents cooked before they, according to some beliefs, became beings of pure energy. Take a bite down memory lane with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $12 for $25 worth of ...

Haircut with Option for Partial or Full Highlights at House of Style (Up to 62% Off)

Smoothing out your hair in the morning is a hassle, typically involving haranguing it with a straightening iron or running it through the fingers of a jazz pianist. Simplify your routine with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options...

Vodka Mixed-Drink Flight, Skyy Vodka Bottle Service, or $14 for $28 Worth of Alcoholic Drinks at Mandala Lounge

The finest vodkas are fermented from blue-ribbon-winning potatoes grown in soil watered with the tears of Russian dignitaries. Taste the purest spirits in the land with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $15 for a specialty-...

One or Three 60-Minute Swedish or Aromatherapy Massages at Harmony Beauty Spa (Up to 52% Off)

Although your body is a temple, covering yourself in bits of stained glass and swallowing thousands of candles has yet to be proved an effective beautification method. Shine up your shrine with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Opti...

$79 for 30-Minute Boudoir Photo Session with One 8”x10” Print and Digital File from ultra-spective ($675 Value)

In a long-distance relationship, you can keep the romance alive by mailing boudoir photos or a novelty gun that shoots out a flag that says, “Sexy.” Keep your eternal flame flickering with this Groupon. $79 for a 30-Minute Boud...

One or Three Basic Mani-Pedis at Miyuko Nails (Up to 53% Off)

Spending a day at the salon can make you feel like royalty, much like cleaning out your earwax with a tiny silver spoon. Rule with a soft, well-moisturized fist with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $17 for one basic mani...

$59 for Five-Course Seasonal Tasting Menu for Two at Radio Africa & Kitchen ($100 Value)

Dining at a restaurant is more relaxing than foraging in a grocery store or futilely trying to hunt and trap a food truck. Track down a stationary meal with this Groupon. $59 for Five-Course Seasonal Tasting Menu for Two ($100 Valu...

One, Two, or Three Brazilian Blowouts or Keratin Complex Treatments at Salon Belle de Soir (Up to 65% Off)

When left to run wild, hairs usually wind up in the drain stopper or stuck in the doorjamb of a crime scene. Discipline your strands for their own good with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $125 for one Brazilian Blowout o...

One, Three, or Five 45-Minute Horseback Riding Lessons at Byron Equestrian (Up to 70% Off)

All the coolest people from history have ridden horses: knights, cowboys, the top portions of centaurs. Relive history with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for one 45-minute horseback riding lesson (a $100 value) $99 ...

Three or Six Microcurrent LED Body-Sculpting Treatments at Back 2 Perfect Wellness Center (Up to 70% Off)

Displaying your cellulite-free legs at the beach will let you feel as confident as the lifeguard who allowed himself to be swallowed by a shark so that he could beat it up from the inside. Be the star of the beach with this Groupon....

Day at Computer History Museum for Two or Four (Up to 52% Off)

Museums bring history alive, like a skeleton found underneath your house. Dig up the past with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for general admission for two (up to a $30 value) $29 for general admission for four (up ...

One, Three, or Six Flawless Rejuvination Facials at Rejuvinate & Eternity (Up to 54% Off)

A facial rehydrates skin that's been dried out by years of hanging out in the sun or being trapped inside a large, airtight plastic bag. Break out without breaking out with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $24 for one Flaw...

One 60- or 90-Minute Deep-Tissue Massage at Shalomtouch (Up to 54% Off)

Massages help you relax and discover whether or not your nervous system is still functioning after a home cooked blowfish dinner. Did you feel that with this Groupon? Choose Between Two Options $49 for one 60-minute deep-tissue m...

Beer, Wine, and Mixed Drinks for Two or Four at Blackthorn Tavern (Up to 52% Off)

Like an etch-a-sketch or a man covered in ants, cocktails just beg to be shaken. Stir up the nightlife with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $17 for $35 worth of beer, wine, and mixed drinks for two $29 for $60 worth of b...

Removal of One, Three, or Five Moles or Skin Tags at Essential Aesthetics (Up to 73% Off)

It's often hard to tell a mole or beauty mark apart from the black spot used to mark people for pirate kidnapping. Avoid misunderstandings with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $59 for the removal of one mole or skin tag (...

10 or 20 $5 Punch Cards for Pizza at Papa Murphy's Take 'N' Bake Pizza (Up to 51% Off)

Teenagers idolize pizza due to its portable nature and refusal to stay in a box, man. Eat your way to independence with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $25 for a 10-punch $5 punch card (a $50 value) $49 for a 20-punch $5...

Basic Facial with Creamy Mask, or Chemical Peel with Vitamin C Treatment at La Tour Salon (Up to 54% Off)

When skin gets dry in cold weather, it flakes off like a snowflake--which would be beautiful if it weren't a dead part of you. Get a flurry of compliments with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for a Basic 60-minute fa...

Italian Cuisine at Basso's Restaurant (Up to 52% Off). Three Options Available.

Without neighborhood restaurants to congregate in, neighbors would be forced to hold barbecues in busy intersections and demand soft drinks from passing firemen. Avoid awkward dining experiences with this Groupon. Choose from Three...

$30 for One Month of Unlimited Bikram Yoga and Power-Yoga Classes at Red Dragon Yoga (Up to $175 Value)

A sun salutation can help you have a stress-free morning, especially after failing to explain daylight-saving time to the neighborhood rooster. Greet the dawn gracefully with this Groupon. $30 for One Month of Unlimited Bikram and ...

Chinese Food at Uncle Chen Restaurant (Half Off). Two Options Available.

When it comes to clairvoyant pastries, breaking apart a fortune cookie is much more dignified than digging through a jelly donut in search of a keychain magic 8 ball. Feast on your future with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Optio...

Body Wrap with Optional Body Scrub at Venus Bodywork, Inc. (Up to 56% Off)

Time and pressure create profound transformations, turning coal into diamonds and diamonds into milk. Become something new with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $59 for any body wrap (a $119 value) $69 for any body wrap w...

One or Two 60-Min Swedish Massages or Cranio Sacral Therapy Sessions at Mystic Hands Massage & Body Work (Up to 55% Off)

When pressed, a person's back will admit its innermost fantasies, such as sleeping on a bed of rolling pins or crowd-surfing at a conference of massage therapists. Take some tactile truth serum with this Groupon. Choose from Four O...

$39 for a Pro Bicycle Tune-Up at Columbus Cyclery ($80 Value)

Bike shops fix everything from rusty bike chains to frames bent by the hooves of vengeful, unemployed horses. Spruce up your mechanical steed with this Groupon. $39 for a Pro Bicycle Tune-Up ($80 Value) For the Pro tune-up, an exp...

10 or 20 Adult MMA Fitness Classes or One Month of Children’s Classes at Bay Area Fight Academy (Up to 85% Off)

The ability to karate chop through wood is a good skill to have if you're going for your black belt or ever have to fight your way out of a lumberyard. Strike a cord with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $25 for 10 adult f...

One or Four Blowouts, Color Treatment, or Haircut and Keratin Treatment at Stunners n Smashers Spalon (Up to 59% Off)

Cutting hair requires finesse, just like cutting ties with the baby geese that have imprinted on your faux-fur coat. Let follicles down gently with this Groupon. Choose From Four Options $17 for a blowout (a $35 value) $60 for fo...

One or Three Mani-Pedis or Gel Manicures at Flirt Nail Lounge (Up to 54% Off)

Beauty sometimes requires assistance, which is why celebrities have personal stylists and a lot of the most famous constellations are actually CGI. Look like a star with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $17 for one mani-ped...

One or Three Ion Magnum Body-Slimming Treatments at La Vitalitee (Up to 67% Off)

Losing weight can make you feel like yourself at last, unlike entering witness protection, which always makes you "Darby Hatbox." Show off the new you with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $99 for one Ion Magnum rapid bod...

2, 4, or 10 Movies with Popcorn and Drinks at BlueLight Cinemas 5 (59% Off)

Before modern cinema, the term motion picture referred to tossing children’s artwork out the car window. Catch a flick with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $17 for a movie package (a $34.40 total value) 2 anytime movie...

Par-3 and Putting-Course Rounds for Two or Four at Grayson Woods Golf Course (Up to 55% Off)

When Atlantis fell, the only survivors were its golfers, whose vast knowledge of water hazards saw them to safety. Hone game-saving skills with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $23 for a golf outing for two (up to a $46 t...

$49 for Silver Package Interior-Exterior Detailing for a Car or SUV at SCR Automotive ($185 Value)

Car washes spray away a car's dirt and grime, but nothing can rinse away its deep-seated sense of guilt over crushing that ladybug. Give your automobile a fresh start with this Groupon. $49 for a Silver Interior and Exterior Detail...

Group Kitesurfing Lesson for Two Hours on Land or Three Hours on Water at Live2kite (Up to 53% Off)

After discovering electricity while flying his kite, Benjamin Franklin invented kitesurfing to discover the ocean. Be a wind-fueled pioneer with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $95 for a two-hour group kitesurfing lesson ...

Japanese Teppanyaki Meal for Two or $10 for $20 Worth of Japanese Cuisine at Koto Teppanyaki & Sushi

Watching chefs prepare your dinner ensures that they are using fresh ingredients instead of arranging pictures cut from the menu atop a bed of rice. See food with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for two Japanese teppa...

One, Three, or Five Anticellulite Body Wraps at Lavoro Laser (Up to 67% Off)

The aging process slows down when you get a body wrap, just as the legal process slows down when you shout, "No, Your Honor, you're out of order!" instead of just reading the verdict. Hold wrinkles in contempt with this Groupon. Ch...

$49 for a Photo Shoot with Prints and an Image CD at James F Edwards Photography @ Pharaoh Studios ($260 Value)

Sitting for a photo was once a long and arduous process, as evidenced by the unkempt facial hair grown by our earliest presidents during their portrait sessions. Capture a clean image with this Groupon. $49 for a Photo-Shoot Packag...

"Michael Jackson ONE" by Cirque du Soleil at Cirque du Soleil

Recognized the world over for high-quality artistic entertainment, Cirque du Soleil has brought its unique combination of dance, acrobatics, art, and music to more than 100 million spectators. Be among the first to see the show with...

Beauty Products at The Beauty Source (Up to 52% Off). Two Options Available.

Maintaining your hair and skin can help project a professional image more easily than sewing a three-piece suit from business cards or replacing your head with a briefcase. Finesse your façade with this Groupon. Choose Between Two...

Laser Toenail-Fungus Treatment for One or Both Feet at Foot Doctor of the East Bay (67% Off)

People try to hide nail fungus by always keeping their socks on or skiing everywhere. Flaunt your feet year round with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $299 for one laser toenail-fungus treatment for one foot (a $900 valu...

20 or 35 Classes for 60 Days at Bikram Yoga Seacliff (Up to 89% Off)

Perspiration gets mischievous when cooped up inside the body, acting out by drenching armpits on first dates and disguising itself as tears during job interviews. Release disgruntled body water with this Groupon. Choose Between Two...

Hands-On Intro Flight with Photo for One Pilot with Optional Guest or Two Pilots from Fly Bay Area (Up to 51% Off)

Flying is the only way to get close enough to a cloud to milk it or to visit your secret sky family. Break free from earthly bonds with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $159 for a U-Fly Adventure SkyTour for one pilot with...

Chinese Dinner and a Magic Show Featuring Comedian Mike Toy for Two, Four, or Eight (Up to 55% Off)

Choose from Three Options $99 for dinner and a comedic magic show for two (up to a $200 value, including ticketing fees) $189 for dinner and a comedic magic show for four (up to a $400 value, including ticketing fees) $359 for din...

San Francisco Culinary Tour for Two or Four from San Francisco Food Safari (Up to 64% Off)

Like smashing a snow globe against your forehead, tours can open up a fascinating new world right before your eyes. Go beyond the surface with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $19 for a Culinary Gems of North Beach tour f...

Taster Set or Full Set of Semipermanent Synthetic Eyelashes from Lashes by BL (Up to 76% Off)

Eyelash extensions give eyes a glamorous look, much like wearing designer frames or contact lenses made of mink fur. Get a stylish look with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $69 for a taster set of 30–40 semipermanent s...

Mediterranean Dinner with Drinks and Dessert for Two or Four at Melody Lounge (Up to 57% Off)

Going out to eat is more convenient than cooking, especially if all your colanders are already full of pasta you haven't gotten around to eating yet. Save all that pasta for another day with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options...

One or Three Hand-Wash Packages or One Detail for a Car, SUV, or Large SUV at Al's Auto Detail (Up to 53% Off)

Many of cinema's iconic moments involve automobiles, from the famous car scene in Cars to the unforgettable car scene in Cars 2. Take pride in your ride with this Groupon. Choose from Six Options $37 for a three hand-wash package...

Three or Six Lipo Lite Treatments at Synergy Functional Medicine and Laser Pain Center (Up to 63% Off)

Despite their destructive cinematic depictions, most lasers are helpful, often found assisting slideshow presentations and playing DVDs for people who aren’t entertained by just staring at the shiny part. Let a laser do some good ...

Three-Hour Introductory Beekeeping Class for One or Two at Round Rock Honey (Up to 68% Off)

Honeybees act as nature's cupid, spreading love from flower to flower by distributing pollen and buzzing the harmonies of Boyz II Men songs. Harvest the nectar of amorous blooms with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $45 f...

Dental Sports or Night Guard or Dental Exam with Cleaning and Whitening from Dr. Tiffany Nguyen D.D.S (Up to 69% Off)

Teeth are more than just precious rocks that fall out of skulls so that they can be turned into jewelry. Keep your headstones polished with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $199 for a dental sports guard or night guard (a...

Three-Hour Beginners' Photography Class with or without Photo Walk for One or Two at Isla Studio (70% Off)

A skilled photographer captures a subject’s sense of wonder, such as when a baby discovers a flying butterfly or when a baby discovers flying. Document developmental milestones with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $45 fo...

All-Day Golf Outing for Two or Four Including Lunch at Washoe Creek Golf Course (Up to 54% Off)

Golf-club designers often consult aerospace engineers to fulfill dreams of experimental-alloy drivers and converting the solar system into a nine-hole executive course. Take your game to the next frontier with this Groupon. Choose ...

Spa Package for One or Two with Facial, Massage, and Body Scrub at Fremont Day Spa (Up to 59% Off)

Looking good requires a concerted effort, much like setting a fire with your mind and then apologizing even though that was obviously cool. Impress everyone with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $99 for a spa package for ...

One, Three, or Five Custom Airbrush Tans at Sun City Tanning (Up to 66% Off)

A spray tan keeps people from discovering that you've spent the entire summer in the basement finding the courage to love again. Get a healthy glow with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $19 for one custom airbrush tan (a $...

Zoom! Teeth-Whitening Treatment or Dental Exam with X-rays and Cleaning at Davidson Dental Group (Up to 86% Off)

Tooth whitening can help remove stains left by coffee, tea, hot chocolate, or--the most popular hot beverage of all--all of the above mixed together in a shoebox lined with wax paper (you drink it by punching a hole in the bottom). ...

Shellac Manicure or Deluxe Mani-Pedi at Donna Salon (Up to 53% Off)

Most people value you for what is on the outside, except for dogs, who can smell that you are full of bones. Upgrade your outsides with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $19 for a Shellac manicure (a $40 value) $22 for a ...

Haircut and Style with Optional Root Touchup or Deep Conditioning at Bella Rose (Up to 54% Off)

Hair will keep getting longer until someone cuts it off, much like an after-dinner lecture on the importance of following your dreams. Get the length you long for with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $29 for a haircut, bl...

$49 for a One-Hour Meridian Massage at Mind Of Beauty Day Spa ($125 Value)

The body's internal energy can be easily disrupted by keeping an irregular sleep schedule, repressing anger, or squeezing an ice cube in your hand and slowly lowering your fist into a sink of hot water. Restore the balance with this...

Two, Four, Six, or Eight Veneers with Exam or Dental Exam with Cleaning at Valencia Dental Center (Up to 83% Off)

It's important to take care of your teeth so you can chew for your whole life and so that your skeleton doesn't look all malnourished. Make a lasting impression with this Groupon. Choose from Five Options $999 for an exam, x-rays...

One, Three, or Five Hypno-Band Weight-Loss Hypnosis Sessions at HypnoRosie (Up to 55% Off)

Hypnosis unlocks the power of the subconscious mind, which is usually preoccupied with remembering all the dogs you've ever seen. Free your mind with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $99 for one gastric-lap-band hypnosis s...

5 or 10 Yoga Classes or One Month of Unlimited Yoga at Zazen (Up to 59% Off)

The yoga studio is a safe place to work out, unlike the home of a stranger who promised you unlimited access to his room full of 20-pound hammers. Be well with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for 5 yoga classes (a $90...

One, Three, or Six Phytobiodermie Cellulite-Reduction Treatments at Caramella Skin Couture (Up to 55% Off)

Much like mountain ranges, cellulite deposits take years to form and can stand between you and the coast. Tighten your body's topography with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $55 for one Phytobiodermie cellulite-reduction ...

Three Alma Laser Cellulite-Reducing Treatments on a Small, Medium, or Large Area at ForeViva Medical Clinique (67% Off)

Choose from Three Options $149 for three cellulite-reducing treatments on a small area (a $447 value) $299 for three cellulite-reducing treatments on a medium area (a $897 value) $399 for three cellulite-reducing treatments on a l...

One or Three 60-Minute Swedish, Prenatal, or Four-Hands Tandem Massages at Pecosas Touch (Up to 61% Off)

At a certain age it becomes important to take care of yourself, usually right after your set of baby muscles falls out. Be stronger than your baby self with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $39 for one Swedish or prenatal m...

One or Three 90-Minute Facial Packages at Skin by Sharon Elizabeth (Up to 71% Off)

The human face can display a formidable array of emotions, including confusion as to the location of Wyoming and relief after finally locating Wyoming. Smooth your facial geography with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $65...

Three-Course Fondue Dinner for Two, Four, Six, or Eight at The Melting Pot (Up to 38% Off)

Fondue is a ubiquitous staple of Swiss culture, matched only by neutrality, multiuse pocketknives, and the world's most easy-to-draw cheese. Go for a dip with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $89 for a three-course meal wit...

Café Lunch for Two or Dinner for Two or Four with Sandwiches and Drinks at Kiks Café (Up to 54% Off)

Sandwiches can be any combination of bread, filling, and spread, which is why they are called "the slot machine of foods." Hit the jackpot with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $12 for a café lunch for two (up to a $25.90 ...

Six Laser Tattoo-Removal Treatments for a Small, Medium, or Large Area at Looking Glass Plastic Surgery (Up to 56% Off)

There are two ways to make a tattoo disappear—getting it removed or getting a new skin-colored tattoo on top of it. Rethink your ink with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $199 for six laser tattoo-removal treatments on a...

$39 for $200 or $89 for $300 Toward Prescription Eyewear at 20/20 Optical

Wearing eyeglasses is the easiest way to look intelligent, closely beating out reading a full set of encyclopedias on the bus or being British. Wise up your eyes with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for $200 toward a...

$40 for $100 Worth of Custom Framing Services at Framed and Cornered

Framed vacation photos surround you with memories of paradise and are less disruptive than filling your cubicle with sand. Frame your happiness with this Groupon. $40 for $100 Worth of Custom Framing Services The staff can frame s...

$39 for a 60-Minute Massage of Your Choice at Sunrise Day Spa ($78 Value)

Staying healthy can prime you for life's challenges, from running a marathon to running from the people in an evil marathon. Get ready for anything with this Groupon. $39 for a 60-Minute Massage ($78 Value) Each massage session be...

All-Natural Pizza and Hot Sandwiches at Straw Hat Pizza (52% Off). Two Options Available.

Pizza is associated with many shapes: the circle it starts in, the triangles it’s sliced into, and the pyramids people form trying to steal a glimpse of it. Have a geometrically balanced meal with this Groupon. Choose Between Two...

One-Year Membership or $10 for $20 Worth of Museum Books and Gifts at Chinese Historical Society of America

History museums show us how people used to live: in history museums with all their possessions behind glass display cases. Intrude on the past with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for a one-year contributing membershi...

Two- or Four-Week Unlimited Boot-Camp Sessions at 925Bootcamp (Up to 84% Off)

Getting into shape involves building muscle, losing fat, and shaving bones down into less massive bones. Look lithe with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $25 for one two-week fat furnace slim-down program (a $147 value) $...

One or Three 60-Minute Massages at Always Tan Skin and Body (Up to 53% Off)

Muscles, like the tails of sleeping cats or levers labeled drain ocean, were never meant to be pulled. Reverse the damage with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for one 60-minute massage (up to a $98 value) $139 for th...

One or Three Microdermabrasion Treatments or Facials at Essential Bella Inc. (Up to 63% Off)

Having a baby face can have unforeseen benefits, such as being mistaken for a famous baby actor. Look younger with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $55 for one 60-minute microdermabrasion treatment (a $120 value) $159 for t...

One or Three Microdermabrasion Treatments at Indulgence Beauty Lounge (Up to 66% Off)

Crystals are strong as well as beautiful, just like the daughter you wish you had. See a younger version of yourself with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $59 for one microdermabrasion facial treatments (a $135 value) $13...

60-Minute Massage or Chiropractic Consultation, Exam, and Adjustment at Piedmont Network Chiropractic (Up to 75% Off)

A massage promotes physical health while inducing relaxation, much like affixing a lava lamp to the front of your treadmill. Feel good and unwind with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for a 60-minute massage (an $85 v...

One or Three Microdermabrasions at Toso Skin Care (Up to 54% Off)

True beauty lies within, which explains the perennial popularity of the Sports Illustrated CAT Scan edition. Turn your face into the cover model for your compelling content with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for on...

One or Two 90-Minute Spa Packages with Wraps and Massage at Natural Rhythm Healing Hut (Up to 71% Off)

Human touch is essential to the emotional development of a relationship and the physical development of high-fiving muscles. Hail to the powers of hands with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $65 for one 90-minute Natural M...

North Indian Cuisine at Khana Peena Indian Cuisine (Up to 51% Off). Two Options Available.

Few things are as satisfying as a good meal or the thrum of a crossbow as it sends a bolt into a ham. Hit the spot with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $20 for $40 worth of North Indian cuisine for two $39 for $80 worth ...

$175 for Three Laser Hair-Removal Treatments at Serenity MedSpa (Up to $600 Value)

Clearing your body of unwanted hair makes your skin smooth enough to convince blind people they're holding a huge baby. Be a big softy with this Groupon. $175 for Three Laser Hair-Removal Treatments (Up to $600 Value) Specialists ...

50- or 80-Minute Massage with a Chiropractic Exam at Flourish (Up to 83% Off)

Massage therapists learn to remove knots to make their clients happy, just as Boy Scouts learn to tie knots to make the ghost of Teddy Roosevelt stop sobbing tears of fury. Be prepared with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options ...

Eyelash Perm, 10 Brow Threadings, Eyelash Extensions, or Eyelash-Extension Program at iCandy Eye Salon (Up to 55% Off)

Long lashes are a symbol of glamour, unlike short lashes, which are an indication that a person leans in too close to fires. Get smoldering glances with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $29 for one lash perm and tint (a $65...

Visit for Two or Four to the USS "Hornet" Museum (Up to 55% Off)

History tends to repeat itself, which means there’s a good chance you’ll get run over by another war elephant. Admire what history has taught us thus far with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $16 for admission for two...

$15 for $30 Worth of Pub Food at Drinks at Cameron’s Restaurant, Pub & Inn

Even novice sommeliers know that a filet mignon should be paired with a rich red wine and a cheeseburger should be paired with a snifter of dipping ketchup. Set your muzzle to guzzle with this Groupon. $15 for $30 Worth of Pub Food...

60-Minute Chiropractic Massage with Option for MyoVision Scan and Exam at Orcutt Chiropractic (Up to 82% Off)

If heads were meant to be pitched forward, then there would be a summersault lane on every sidewalk. Keep a good head on your shoulders with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for a chiropractic package (a $265 total val...

Wine-Tasting Package for Two or Four with Cheese Pizzetta and Bottle of Wine at Taste at Oxbow (54% Off)

Different alcohols require different drinking rituals, such as topping off a keg beer or soaking all night in a bathtub full of Kahlua. Master the refined way to imbibe with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for a wine...

$49 for Zoom! At-Home Teeth-Whitening Kit at Avalon Dental ($274 Value)

The perfect human would have sparkling-white teeth, minty-fresh breath, and can openers for hands. Get as close to perfection as possible with this Groupon. $49 for Zoom! At-Home Teeth-Whitening Kit ($274 Total Value) Whitening t...

$2,799 for a Complete Invisalign Treatment at Gorgeous Smile Dental ($6,000 Value)

Wearing braces improves teeth, much like trapping a mime in an actual box improves their performances. Straighten up with this Groupon. $2,799 for a Complete Invisalign Treatment ($6,000 Value) Invisalign straightens teeth with a ...

Custom Framing at Back to the Picture (Up to 61% Off). Two Options Available.

Frames are perfect for preserving a memory, or for breaking over your head to erase a memory. Get in the right frame of mind with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for $100 worth of custom framing $99 for $200 worth of...

10 or 20 CrossFit Classes at Five Points Crossfit (Up to 88% Off)

Breaking a sweat not only cools you down during exercise but also rids your body of the disgusting water that's just building up inside you. Sweat it out with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for 10 CrossFit classes (...

Individual or Couple's Well-Being Massage Packages at Thiparpa Thai Massage in Foster City (63% Off)

Having sore muscles, like wearing a suit of armor or signing a five-year lease, makes it difficult to move. Evict bodily stress with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $55 for one well-being massage package (a $149 value) $1...

$39 for $80 Worth of Spa Services at Tru

A day spa is a place to relax as beauty professionals look after aesthetic needs, whereas a night spa is a place crammed with monsters. Stay on the bright side with this Groupon. $39 for $80 Worth of Spa Services Customers can lux...

$35 for In-Shop or Mobile Auto Detailing from ADS Mobile ($65 Value)

A car wash can make an old vehicle look new or a stolen vehicle look so beloved that the original owner will concede you're taking better care of it. Get away clean with this Groupon. $35 for a One-Hour Auto-Detail Package ($65 Val...

Visit for Two or Four to the Quarryhill Botanical Garden (Half Off)

For thousands of years, humans have studied trees to learn how they too can provide suitable housing for squirrels and grow lemons from their fingertips. Branch out with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $10 for a single-d...

Massage with Postural Exam, or Two-Massage Package with Energy Work at Dance With Life Chiropractic (Up to 66% Off)

Like house parties, massages give people an excuse to forget about everyday stresses and fall asleep on someone else's table. Let loose with this Groupon. $55 for 60-Minute Massage with Postural Exam, or Two-Visit Gold Healing Pack...

$189 for an Open-Water Diver Certification Course from Sonoma Coast Divers ($384 Value)

Humans have long envied fish for their ability to breathe underwater and swim naked without everybody getting all weird about it. Get slippery with this Groupon. $189 for an Open-Water Diver Certification Course ($384 Value) One ...

$39 for a 60-Minute Massage at The Kneaded Spot ($80 Value)

Sometimes it's necessary to apply pressure to the body, as when a lower back is aching or a left arm is refusing to help rob a bank. Keep your body in line with this Groupon. $39 for a 60-Minute Swedish Massage ($80 Value) Long, ...

One or Three Facials at Sharpe Image Beauty Salon (Up to 58% Off)

A facial can cleanse your face of accumulated grime, pollution, and the nearly invisible arrows volleyed at you by your tiny enemies. Face them head on with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for one European, acne, or ...

Three-Hour Photography Basics or Golden Gate at the Golden Hours Workshop from Eric C. Gould Photography (Up to 67% Off)

Before the invention of the camera, people who wanted to document action in progress had to sketch speedily or crochet frantically. Revel in modern technology with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for a three-hour Pho...

One, Two, or Three Brazilian Waxes at HauteWaxxed Browtique (Up to 53% Off)

Most people think that there's no use for warm wax other than as a spreadable topping to make sandwiches more awful. Put wax to work with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $27 for one Brazilian wax (a $55 value) $53 for two...

Facial with Optional Reflexology Treatment, or One Reflexology Treatment at Lexy's at The Spot (Up to 56% Off)

Facials make your skin as smooth and radiant as a GarnerTech Energy Cube™—_"The Glowing Box You Should Avoid Prolonged Eye Contact With!"_ Get a healthy glow with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for a 45-minute re...

Candy Tin and Tube or Three-Compartment Box of British Sweets at Fiona’s Sweetshoppe (Up to 54% Off)

It's great to reward yourself with some candy after an accomplishment, such as passing your driver's exam or eating a whole bag of candy. Treat yourself with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $9 for a candy box containing ...

60-Minute Massage with Optional Exfoliating Scrub at Maya’s Massage Therapy (Up to 64% Off)

A massage releases stress more peacefully than primal-scream therapy and more discreetly than a highly televised bulldozer rampage. Find an appropriate outlet with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for a 60-minute mass...

Deep-Cleansing or Anti-Aging Facial and Swedish Massage with Foot Reflexology at Splendor Medical Spa (Up to 53% Off)

A sore back can make everyday tasks harder, from crawling out of bed in the morning to sewing yourself into the bed at night. Add relaxation to your routine with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $75 for a spa package with ...

Italian Cuisine for Dinner for Two or Four at Viva Vocé Café (Up to 51% Off)

People enjoy sharing pizza with their friends because the circular shape reminds them of the rings they'll exchange in that evening's Friendship Commitment Ceremony. Circle around this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $20 for ...

$ 2,999 for Blade-Free LASIK Eye Surgery at LaserVue Eye Center ($ 5,000 Value)

Wearing glasses can be inconvenient, especially when trying to put in your contacts. Enjoy a lens-free lifestyle with this Groupon. $2,999 for Blade-Free LASIK Eye Surgery ($5,000 Value) Using IntraLase technology, the doctor crea...

10 Classes or One Month of Unlimited Classes at Sivananda Yoga Vedanta Center (Up to 83% Off)

Yoga teaches people how to sustain poses while controlling their breath, a technique most yogis use to live undetected in wax museums. Steady your stillness skills with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for one month o...

60-Minute Thai Massage or 60- or 90-Minute Swedish Couples Massage at Voilà La Familia (Up to 57% Off)

Without massages, shoulders would stiffen into immobility and fall victim to freeloading parrots and the burden of carrying Earth's heavyset brother, Girth. Pamper your perches with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $49 for ...

Italian Dinner for Two or Four with Appetizers, Entrees, Wine, and Dessert at Pasta Pelican (Up to 51% Off)

Benjamin Franklin theorized that taking in a good view while eating aided in digestion and granted you the ability to squeeze milk out of coal. Prove him half-right with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $35 for an Italian ...

$599 for Six Zerona Laser Body-Sculpting Treatments at Calistoga Massage & Chiropractic Center ($2,400 Value)

Light comes in many forms—be it beautiful, like a rainbow, practical, like a laser, or awe-inspiring, like an applause sign’s first live studio performance. Harness the beautifying power of light with this Groupon. $599 for Six...

Keratin Treatments or Brazilian Blowouts at Your Moda Salon (Up to 69% Off). Four Options Available.

Like the ocean, hair can be smooth one day, wavy the next, and sometimes needs to be cleansed of its oily surface. Get your unfathomable tresses under control with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $89 for an express keratin...

One or Three 60-Minute Massages or One 60-Minute Couples Massage at Dryad Bodywork and Massage (Up to 52% Off)

Massage therapists are known for their strong hands, which means that the best way to find one is to follow a trail of open pickle jars. Find a helping hand with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for one 60-minute Swedi...

Massages, LED Facials, and Hydro-Derma Fusion Treatments at Planet Beach Contempo Spa (Up to 88% Off)

In the Dark Ages, princesses exfoliated with Fabergé-egg dust and filed fingernails on the edges of gold doubloons. Revel in more modern and luxurious beauty treatments with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for three...

3 or 10 Pole-Dancing and Aerial-Fitness Classes at Phoenix Aerial Art and Pole (61% Off)

Pole dancing is one of the most popular pole-related ways to get in shape, second to building a polecat totem pole with your feet. Vertically sculpt your muscles with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for 3 pole-dancin...

The Wax Museum at Fisherman's Wharf Visit for Two or Four (Up to 56% Off)

Wax museums give visitors a chance to get an up-close look at celebrities without resorting to hanging around outside their houses or showing up at ceremonies disguised as an award. Get carried away with this Groupon. Choose Betwee...

Massage and Foot Soak, or Massage, Foot Soak, and LED Light Therapy Facial at Millennium Salon & Day Spa (Up to 61% Off)

Everybody unwinds from a stressful day differently—some people get a massage, while others watch a flame engulf a big pile of tires. Let tension melt away with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for a 60-minute deep-t...

Haircut and Style, Flamboyage Highlights, or Keratin Treatment at Lucia's Health and Beauty (Up to 55% Off)

Cultural icons often have signature hairstyles, from Little Orphan Annie's luscious red curls to the bald cap hiding Michael Jordan's luscious red curls. Find your own iconic look with this Groupon. Choose Between Three Options $...

Three-Course Mediterranean Meal for Two, Four, or Six at Layaly Mediterranean Grill (Up to 59% Off)

Everyone should have access to healthy, nutritious food, even babies, who feed mostly on sunlight. Baby your body with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $29 for a three-course Mediterranean meal for two (up to a $64 total v...

70-Minute Massage or Facial Package for One or Two at Shamrock Day Spa (Up to 61% Off). Four Options Available.

Massage is a necessary part of athletes' regimens, as it prepares them for the rigors of darting across the field to get away from a weird-looking bug. Calm down with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $59 for a 70-minute mas...

$14 for Chocolate and Wine Pairing Package for Two at Vintage Sweet Shoppe ($28 Value)

Milk chocolate is created by blending cocoa beans and milk, while white chocolate is created when young chocolates first encounter ghosts. Peruse all shades of chocolate with this Groupon. $14 for a Chocolate and Wine Pairing Packa...

Mexican Meal for Two or Four at Baja Fresh (Up to 52% Off)

The spicy ingredients of Mexican fare can evoke fond childhood memories of eating still-lit birthday cakes. Enjoy a hot meal with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $12 for a Mexican meal for two (a $23.74 total value) Two...

60- or 90-Minute Therapeutic Massage at Indulge Salon (Up to 66% Off)

If deprived of massages, your muscles will gradually contract and twine together until they spell out the phone number of the nearest hospital. Answer the cry for help with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $45 for a 60-mi...

Mediterranean Food and Drinks for Two or Four at Zaki Kabob House

Shish kebab is as fun to eat as it is to pronounce, much like rutabaga and cumulonimbus. Exercise your tongue with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $17 for $30 worth of Mediterranean food and drinks for two or more $35 fo...

Cajun Cuisine and Seafood at Cajun House (Half Off). Two Options Available.

Being served by a good waiter makes you feel important, much like hearing people talk about something you did over a grocery store's intercom. Get what's coming to you with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for $30 wor...

6 or 12 Pole-Dancing Classes or Private Pole-Dancing Party for Up to 10 at iCandy Pole Dance Studio (Up to 54% Off)

Pole dancing offers a pole-based exercise more effective than 1920s pole sitting, more energizing than pole vaulting, and more sensual than polenta. Go for a spin with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $34 for four 60-minut...

One, Three, or Five Brazilian Waxes from Ashley Marie Skin Care at pHyxx Salon (Up to 57% Off)

Hair removal can be tricky, especially if the hair is somehow connected directly to your skin through some nefarious prank of nature. Vanquish skin vandalism with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $29 for one Brazilian wax ...

Laser Nail-Fungus Removal for One or Both Feet at Advanced Foot Clinic in Oakland (67% Off)

Lasers brighten dull toenails, just as a drunk meteorologist brightens a dull newscast. Get everyone's attention with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $299 for laser nail-fungus removal for one foot (a $900 value) $399 fo...

Italian Seafood and Steak-House Meal for Two or Four at Castagnola's (Up to 57% Off)

Waterfront seafood restaurants let diners get close to their meals, much like a goat finally landing a job at a tin-can factory. Get close to the source with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $49 for an Italian seafood-and-...

One or Two Auto-Detailing Packages at Premier Auto Collision (Up to 59% Off)

Auto detailing can help emphasize your car's best features, from a custom hood ornament to the words "cool car" keyed onto the hood. Stop traffic with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $79 for one auto detail (a $180 value...

10 or 15 Muay Thai Kickboxing, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, or Other MMA Classes at True Fight Cub (Up to 87% Off)

Like practicing the piano while leg-pressing another piano, martial arts help develop strength and discipline simultaneously. Bolster body and mind with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for 10 drop-in classes (a $200 ...

Exterior Detailing Package with Light Interior Cleaning for a Car or for an SUV or Truck at Auto Spa (Up to 61% Off)

Driving a shiny car is a great way to experience luxurious transportation without the hassle of carving a carriage out of marble and training a yoke of peacocks to pull it. Keep your ride looking ritzy with this Groupon. Choose Bet...

$129 for Permanent Makeup for the Upper Eyes, Eyebrows, or Lips at Ever Lasting Make-Up ($400 Value)

Leaving makeup on overnight can clog your pores and make your pillow look like it's filled with leaky fruit. Find a sweet solution with this Groupon. $129 for Permanent Makeup for the Upper Eyes, Eyebrows, or Lips ($400 Value) Dur...

Chiropractic Exam with X-rays, Nervous-System Analysis, and One or Three Massages at Smith Chiropractic (Up to 93% Off)

Muscles, like holiday lights, can easily get in knots but garner lots of attention when displayed at parties. Put a twinkle in their eye with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for a chiropractic package (up to a $410 to...

Pub Meal with Drinks for Two, Four, or Six at Maltby's Restaurant (Up to 53% Off)

A meal can bring friends closer together, much like a camping trip or a pact to never mention what happened on the camping trip ever again. Have an evening you'll never forget with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $14 for ...

Smog Check for One or Two Cars at Auto Smog & Oil Changers (Up to 58% Off)

Regular maintenance extends a vehicle's lifespan, allowing it to see its litter of Mini Coopers grow into Coopers and bear it Grandcoopers. Postpone retirement with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for a smog check fo...

One Microdermabrasion with Fruit-Enzyme Peel and Masque or Four Microdermabrasions at World of Health (Up to 53% Off)

A beautiful face is hard to forget, like a catchy tune or a dog in cutoff jean shorts. Make a lasting impression with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $89 for one Fountain of Youth facial (a $190 value) $159 for four micr...

One, Three, or Five Oil Changes at Schwerin Brake and Auto Repair (Up to 74% Off)

Like toothbrushes and American vice presidents, motor oil is best changed every three months. Keep the engine of democracy running smoothly with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $14 for one standard oil change (a $35 value...

Bagels, Sandwiches, or Salads with Drinks for Two or Four at Charlie's Deli Cafe (Up to 55% Off)

Coffee is one of the most popular things to hatch from a bean, aside from fairy-tale beanstalks and Grover Cleveland. Enjoy brewed-bean bliss with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $12 for a café meal for two with two bag...

Three or Six Weeks of Boot-Camp Classes with Body Assessments for One or Two from Fit For Life (Up to 92% Off)

Establishing a regular exercise routine is a great way to show your body you care and is much less painful than swallowing a greeting card. Demonstrate some physical affection with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $22 for t...

$1,999 for Dental-Implant Package with X-rays, Abutment, and Crown at Rotunda Dental ($5,025 Value)

A healthy smile is a natural way of showing affection to a potential mate or aggression to a potential meal. Let your mouth do its will with this Groupon. $1,999 for Dental-Implant Package ($5,025 Value) The package includes: X-...

$17 for Dinner for Two at Auntie April’s Chicken, Waffles and Soul Food ($35 Value)

Dining out can be a great change of atmosphere, especially if you're used to eating your meals hastily in an unguarded meat locker. Have a seat with this Groupon. $17 for Dinner for Two ($35 Value) The dinner includes two pieces o...

Four VelaShape Treatments or Three Months of VelaShape on a Small or Large Area at Aura Skin Spa (Up to 76% Off)

A trimmer waist can help you slip into a form-fitting outfit or one of those human-size hourglasses that are trending this season. Get sleek with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $499 for four VelaShape treatments on a smal...

20 Units of Botox or 60 Units of Dysport at Reviv Med Spa (Half Off)

It's said that youth is wasted on the young, whose fear of authority prevents them from jamming their tiny arms inside vending machines. Grab hold of youth with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $159 for 20 units of Botox ...

$49 for a Russian River Vineyards Deluxe Segway Tour from Segway of Healdsburg ($99 Value)

A segway can reach a top speed of 12.5 miles per hour, akin to the top speeds of a squirrel or a fat, slow cheetah. Roll at your own pace with this Groupon. $49 for a Russian River Vineyards Deluxe Segway Tour ($99 Value) After a ...

$20 for $40 Worth of Mediterranean Food and Drinks at Dinner at Village Kebab

Few things are as satisfying as a good meal or the thrum of a crossbow as it sends a bolt into a ham. Hit the spot with this Groupon. $20 for $40 Worth of Mediterranean Food and Drinks at Dinner The menu includes a falafel wrap ($...

Custom Mink Eyelash Extensions with an Optional Touchup at La Perle (Up to 56% Off)

To catch a viewer's eye, your eyelashes have to be lush, dense, and long enough a get a good grip on it. Arrest nearby eyeballs with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $75 for custom premium mink eyelash extensions (a $150 ...

Four or Eight Fencing Classes for Kids or Adults at Peninsula Fencing Academy (51% Off)

Learning to fence requires patience and a steady hand, much like feeding a squirrel an M&M. Hone your skills with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for four fencing classes for kids or adults (an $80 value) $59 for...

One or Three 60-Minute Massages at Athletic Edge (Up to 60% Off)

Massage is a necessary part of athletes' regimens, as it prepares them for the rigors of darting across the field to get away from a weird-looking bug. Calm down with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $55 for one 60-minute...

Three or Five Infrared Body Wraps at Tanners Paradise (Up to 63% Off)

Modern spa treatments help people stay beautiful without having to spend years in a dark room to keep their skin fresh. Get out there with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $79 for three infrared body wraps (a $189 value) ...

Indian Fare at Currylicious in Oakland. (Up to 53% Off). Two Options Available.

Rice helps to absorb and accentuate the flavor of Indian curries, just as pita absorbs tahini and Wonder Bread absorbs cold cuts. Dig into rice dishes with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $8 for $16 worth of Indian fare ...

$99 for a 45-Minute Boudoir Photo Shoot with Two Digital Images and Prints at Alloria Winter Photography ($568 Value)

Sending a sensual message to someone is easier today than it was in the past, when such messages had to be read aloud to the recipients by their fathers or what used to pass for a doctor. You won't have to spell out your intentions ...

6 or 12 Drop-In Mixed Martial-Arts Classes at AB Mixed Martial Arts Academy (Up to 84% Off)

Martial artists wear colorful belts to indicate their mastery of fighting techniques and their long-standing blood feud with suspenders. Self-defend in style with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for 6 drop-in classes...

One or Three Wash and Waxes for a Car or SUV or Express Detailing for a Car or SUV Technic Auto Center (Up to 76% Off)

Your car relies on you to maintain it regularly and not to gun it across any rivers, even if there are free Thickburgers on the opposite bank. Keep your vehicular promises with this Groupon. Choose from Six Options $29 for one 1.5...

$15 for $30 or $50 for $100 Worth of Dry Cleaning at GreenStreets Cleaners

Clothes make the man, just as monocles make the millionaire and swimming pools full of monocles make the billionaire. Dress for success with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $15 for $30 worth of dry cleaning $50 for $100...

$99 for Boudoir Photo Shoot, 30-Image Disk, and Prints from Boudoir Kiss by Jeffery Warren Photography ($750 Value)

$99 for Boudoir Photography Package ($750 Total Value) One-hour photo shoot (a $300 value) Disk of 30 low-resolution images (a $275 value) Three retouched prints—one 8"x10" and two 5"x7" prints (a $175 value) One-hour proofing s...

Choice of Two Spa Services at Spa at Hotel Monaco (Up to 54% Off). Two Options Available.

Like an English lady's hat catching fire at a garden party, healthy skin is positively glowing. Refine your look with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $110 for one 25-minute and one 50-minute spa service (up to a $230 val...

$49 for $100 Worth of Boutique Shoes and Accessories at Kicks

Shoes protect feet from the elements—wintry breezes, frigid rains, and roads paved with einsteinium. Periodically eschew harsh elements with this Groupon. $49 for $100 Worth of Boutique Shoes and Accessories Dainty pedestals, cr...

Laser Tag for Four or Six at Norcal Laser Tag (Half Off)

Before laser tag, most high-tech entertainment consisted of playing chess against a computer and chucking a victorious computer into a bog. Play nice with technology with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $16 for four game...

Flight-Simulator Package, Flight-Lesson Package, or Bay Plane Tour for Three from Hayward Flight (Up to 51% Off)

The human obsession with flight stems from a refusal to accept limitations and an intense desire to finally move out of gravity's basement. Claim your own airspace with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $49 for a one-hour fl...

Group and Private Dance Lessons at Arthur Murray Dance Studio (Up to 77% Off). Two Options Available.

Circus bears untrained in the art of dance are often the least popular big-top attraction, falling somewhere between the bearded lady and a slice of stale rye bread on a pedestal. Ensure an appearance in the spotlight with this Grou...

Laser Nail-Fungus Treatment for One or Both Feet at The Foot and Ankle Institute of San Francisco (Up to 68% Off)

Light is actually a spectrum of colors, each with its own healing properties—red tackles wrinkles, blue zaps blemishes, and indigo tries to convince everyone it's a real color. Get illuminated with this laser-light Groupon. Choos...

Lunch for Two or Four, or Dinner for Two, Four, or Six at iThai Bankok Street Food (Up to 56% Off)

Restaurants are where we celebrate special occasions, from graduating law school to quitting a corrupt law firm to take justice into your own hands. Make every occasion special with this Groupon. Choose from Five Options $15 for ...

Trim and Bath for Cats or Dogs at Pampered Paws Pet Salon (Up to 64% Off). Two Options Available.

Though television audiences remember Lassie for saving distressed children from wells, her handlers remember her for being a regular dog who didn’t know that she was famous. Treat your pet to celebrity styling with this Groupon. ...

Two, Four, Six, or Eight Porcelain Veneers or Dental Cleaning Package at Alliance Dental & Orthodontics (Up to 83% Off)

A glowing smile charms irritable librarians, stern highway-patrol officers, and judges with highfalutin ideas about driving through the library. Flaunt your beaming beauty with this Groupon. Choose from Five Options $999 for two ...

One or Five Ultimate Exterior Hand Car Washes at Mill Valley Car Wash (Up to 55% Off)

Getting your vehicle cleaned at the car wash uses less water than hosing it down at home and less gas than driving it into a river. Combat grime efficiently with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $7 for one ultimate exterio...

Chiropractic Exam with Consultation, X-ray, and One or Three Massages at Chiropractic Boulevard (Up to 93% Off)

Overworked muscles can form painful knots, which is why so many construction workers give each other shoulder massages during their lunch breaks. Hammer out the hurt with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for a one-visi...

Two-Days of Backpacking in Point Reyes or Castle Rock State Park with Supplies and Meals from Treks and Tracks (52% Off)

The road less traveled is often the more fulfilling one, especially when it bypasses Robert Frost's tiger pits. Diverge from a rote route with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $159 for a two-day backpacking trip in Point ...

10, 20, or 30 Yoga and Fitness Classes at Body Techniques (Up to 82% Off)

Sit-ups remain one of the best methods of reshaping the abdomen, second only to standing in front of a cannon. Enjoy explosive exercise with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $39 for 10 yoga and fitness classes (a $120 valu...

$49 for an Oxygen Facial at Yulia's Skin Care ($120 Value)

A neglected face will rebel by scowling during your wedding vows or sprouting a five o'clock shadow at precisely four. Soothe volatile visages with this Groupon. $49 for an Oxygen Facial ($120 Value) Oxygen facials deliver oxygena...

One or Two Winter-Berry-Chocolate or Quickie Facials at A Place for Your Face (Up to 61% Off)

The skin protects the body from illness and bones from dissolving during rainstorms. Maintain nature's poncho with this Groupon. Choose from Four Options $49 for one winter-berry-and-chocolate facial (a $125 value) $99 for two wi...

Two or Four Semiprivate or Group Horseback-Riding Lessons at Sacred Cross Horse Services (Up to 62% Off)

Horses are some of the most perceptive animals, as evidenced by the saying, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't explain his intimate knowledge of your childhood fears." Tap into equine insight with this Groupon. Choose fr...

$19 for Brunch and Mimosas for Two at Xenia Bistro (Up to $39.90 Value)

Pancakes, like acrobats, are easily stacked but make children cry when they topple to the ground. Have a balanced breakfast with this Groupon. $19 for Brunch for Two (Up to $39.90 Total Value) Two entrees (up to an $11.95 value e...

One, Three, or Five Non-Ablative Fractional Laser Treatments at Aesthetic Laser Concepts (Up to 69% Off)

Summer months make it more difficult to hide skin imperfections beneath scarves or Santa beards. Unveil clear skin with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $249 for one non-ablative fractional laser treatment (a $650 value) $...

Six Laser Hair-Removal Treatments on a Small, Medium, or Large Area at ForeViva Medical Clinique (Up to 86% Off)

In science-fiction movies, bad guys use lasers to burn down national landmarks, whereas good guys use lasers to burn CDs for cool aliens. Get closer encounters with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $149 for six laser hair-...

5, 10, or 20 Fight Shape and Ground & Pound Kickboxing Classes at Crispim BJJ Barra Brothers (Up to 85% Off)

Like practicing the piano while leg-pressing another piano, martial arts help develop strength and discipline simultaneously. Bolster body and mind with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $29 for five Fight Shape and Ground...

$39 for a 28-Day New Year's Fat-Blast Program at Performance Science Training Institute ($485 Value)

Without defined workout routines, adults often spend after-work hours on sedentary hobbies, such as watching TV or reading the treadmill manual. Get up and moving with this Groupon. $39 for a 28-Day New Year's Fat-Blast Program ($4...

6 or 12 CrossFit Sessions at Hercules CrossFit (Up to 73% Off)

More people than ever are living a sedentary lifestyle: waking up in their racecar beds, driving to work in their racecars, sitting for eight hours in the passenger seats of experimental racecars as men in lab coats slam them into c...

Screen-Repair Service for iPhone 3G or 3GS, 4 or 4S, or for iPad 2 at Citicomm Wireless (Up to 57% Off)

Without modern electronics, mankind would have limited access to Bach's symphonies, Hitchcock's films, and Bob Saget's dog and baby voiceovers. Keep your entertaining appliances in working order with this Groupon. Choose from Three...

One or Two 60-Minute Swedish Massages with 30-Minute LED Facials at Krystelle Spa and Salon (Up to 56% Off)

A pretty face easily sticks in one's memory, much like a catchy song or a horse with udders. Stand out from the herd with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $79 for one 60-minute Swedish massage with aromatherapy and a 30-m...

Wildlife Tour for One or Two or Private Charter (Up to 53% Off)

Due to gravity, nonaquatic animals are limited to a single-dimensional plane of movement, with the exception of birds and monkeys—who have learned to burrow. Watch animals float up the z-axis with this Groupon. Choose from Three ...

One or Three Chiropractic Exams with Adjustments and Massages at Tinozzi Chiropractic & Wellness Center (Up to 73% Off)

Getting a chiropractic adjustment is a great way to alleviate pain and ensure your back isn't covered in scorpions. Take care of your body with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $45 for one chiropractic exam with a consult...

Three or Six VHS-to-DVD Transfers at Denevi Digital Imaging (Up to 64% Off)

Memories are easy to create but difficult to re-create, mainly because the Grand Canyon is so difficult to transport. Preserve precious mental keepsakes with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $22 for three videotape-to-DVD...

Haircut-and-Conditioning Package or Keratin Smoothing Treatment at Le Tres Chic Full Service Salon & Spa (Up to 67% Off)

Hair will keep getting longer until someone cuts it off, much like an after-dinner lecture on the importance of following your dreams. Get the length you long for with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $59 for a haircut an...

$25 for $50 Worth of American Bistro Dinner and Drinks for Two or More at Cafe Biere

Unlike robotic parents, a beer and a burger are a natural pair. Initiate hunger protocol with this Groupon. $25 for $50 Worth of Dinner and Drinks for Two or More Cafe Biere's menu of New American cuisine includes bacon-and-blue-c...

Organic Vegetarian Cuisine at The Sunflower Center (Up to 54% Off). Two Options Available.

Organic vegetables are grown without the use of pesticides, as they naturally repel pests by threatening to spoil popular TV dramas that the bugs haven't caught up on. Show good taste with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options ...

5 or 10 Adult Martial-Arts Classes or One Month of Kids’ Classes at Fairtex Muay Thai Fitness (Up to 86% Off)

Breaking a sweat not only cools you down during exercise but also rids your body of the disgusting water that's just building up inside you. Sweat it out with this Groupon. Choose from Three Options $35 for 10 muay thai, MMA, or ...

Weight-Loss Package for One or Two at Bina Jangda Acupuncture & Integrative Health (Up to 80% Off)

Acupuncture needles are different from sewing needles, in that they are much tinier and can't be used to attach patches of fake fur to a T-shirt. Feel the difference with this Groupon. Choose Between Two Options $39 for a weight-l...

Mediterranean Dinner for Two or Four with Hot and Cold Mezza and Baklava at Tannourine Restaurant (Up to 55% Off)