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Nightmare -> Deep Thoughts (9/6/2008 5:40:53 AM)

Do Boys Grow Up Any More?

Don’t take anything in this post too seriously; I’m on my 4th (5th now) Captain and Pepsi tonight.

This is something I have thought about ever since my wife became pregnant. I never planned on being a father. I have always considered myself: “Not responsible enough” to be the main support/provider/parent for a small child. We didn’t do “everything” necessary to make sure it didn’t happen and our daughter was born in October last year.

I don’t know if it is just my perspective or if things are different. Guys don’t generally talk about stuff like this. My brothers are much younger than I am and my dad is part of the reason for this dilemma. Out of all my friends, I’m the most “normal”. So I really don’t know where to go for guidance. Let me get to my point. I’m 38 years old; just to give you an idea of when I was born and what has happened during my lifetime.

My mother became pregnant when she was 21. She and my dad were married at some point after that and before I was born. This was about 1969-1970 for anyone who is bad at math. They divorced when I was very young and my mom has always been the “bread winner” (Is this too many “’s?). In my perspective my mother has always been an “adult”. She finished college, got a very good State job and retired with something like 28 years of service. She is actually still working for the same job in her retirement. She is the rock in the family. She helps out friends and family without a second thought.

Going back one generation; my grandfather and grandmother seemed like “adults”. My grandfather was in the Air Force in WWII. He retired from the AF and took a State Job. He retired from the second job and provided very well for the family. My Grandfather literally went from Share Cropping in the Dust Bowl to owning two homes and putting his kids through college in one Generation. They lived somewhere outside of El Centro (very near Glamis). I can’t imagine living in a shack in the middle of nowhere with my 3 bothers. His sisters were in another shack and his parents were in a very small wood house (about 15x15) that also included the Kitchen.

My dad has always seemed to be immature. Even to this day he makes inappropriate comments around my wife. Not really bad stuff, but things your DAD should not say in front of your WIFE. He is a Vietnam Veteran and I’m not sure if that has something to do with his mental status. If it wasn’t for his new wife I have no doubt he would be dead or living under an overpass (no joke). She puts up with SO much S! it is unbelievable.

So, her I sit at 1:00 am watching “Hitman” on DVD while my daughter sleeps and my wife is working out of town. I’m a full time dad because my wife makes a very good living.

Here is a quick list of things that I would want to do:

Drink
Ride my Quad
Buy a Toybox
Repair and ride my motorcycle
Watch TV
Buy a cool Home Theater
Play World of Warcraft
Buy a new PC so I can edit HD Video
Go Airsofting with my brother tomorrow
Go Scuba Diving
Go Sky Diving (I’ve been tandem twice, I want full lessons)

Is it just me? Or do most guys feel the same way? I have all these “childish” things I want to do, when I should be doing something productive for my family.

Have things really changed that much in 1-2 generations?

I was watching the HBO series “John Adams” last night. John Adams sent his 14 year old son from France to Russia to be a secretary/translator for another diplomat! Holy Crap, would anyone here send their 14 year old to foreign country half way around the world in a time of war?

Do women feel the same way? Or is it just a guy thing? That old saying “The only difference between Men and Boys, is the price of the toys” must have come from somewhere.




trek2039 -> RE: Deep Thoughts (9/7/2008 11:12:43 AM)

quote:

Do women feel the same way?


Yes Nightmare, alot of women feel the same way. My kids are now 15 and 14. I'm now 37 but feel like I'm 25. I have a nice list of things I'd like to do too; it's a matter of working out a balance of doing what you need to do and doing what you want to do. Family has to come first, but you can't ignore the things you want or you'll become an angry, unhappy person. It can be very frustrating to find that balance, but if you really want to you will. Of course it gets easier when the kids are older and can do more for themselves.

quote:

Holy Crap, would anyone here send their 14 year old to foreign country half way around the world in a time of war?


Not a chance in hell.....

And by the way, I was drinking Captian and Coke whie you were drinking your Captian and Pepsi..........[;)]




Kegger22 -> RE: Deep Thoughts (9/7/2008 4:28:10 PM)

quote:

I’m on my 4th (5th now) Captain and Pepsi tonight


ok, that means I have to grab another 12 or so and get back to ya, in the meantime remeber 1 thing

if it's just you and your daughter right now don't overdo your intake, remember, if by chance anything happens you need to have some of your senses going for her sake kind of like a designated driver so to say

I'll be back later after I indulge some more so that I try to make sense of a good answer for ya[:D]




Nightmare -> RE: Deep Thoughts (9/7/2008 8:09:05 PM)

The drinking was between 9:00pm and 1:30am, it's not like I sat down with the bottle.

I was fine for anything short of a drive somewhere. I do have several family members near by, if there was an emergency.




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